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#4.
Citizen Kane
Yeah, even Kane. The greatest film of all time, according to those monocle-wearing types who refuse to even consider Robocop for the title. The Plot: A bunch of reporters try to figure out the meaning of Charles Foster Kane's last words. "Rosebud." The Hole: No one was around to hear them. Now, no one's suggesting that journalists in the 40s weren't good at getting scoops. With the chief breathing down their neck and dames left and right trying to play them for saps, they pretty much had to be good. But unless their source was telepathic or invisible, there's no way they could know what Kane said.
And if they really are just that good, you think they'd also know the twist ending, that Rosebud was his sled (what kind of weirdo names his sled anyway? Does he miss his childhood desk chair too?).
So the next time some film critic is getting all up in your face, picking holes in your favorite movie, hit them with that, and watch them curl up into a ball and weep like a child. Then maybe kick 'em a couple of times. If you think we're being too hard on the critics, remember that they get paid to watch movies and be dicks about them. We on the other hand ... never mind. #3.
Fantastic Voyage
You may not have seen this one if you're the type who refuses to watch movies from before you were born. This is from a better time, when men were men, movie titles told you exactly what to expect (hint: an adventure that is fantastic), and Raquel Welch in a catsuit was the closest thing to pornography a man could get without having to go to a seedy-looking theater with sticky floors and Travis Bickle types making gun fingers at the screen. The Plot: A team of scientists shrink themselves to go inside a patient's body in a tiny little spaceship, in order to fix a blood clot in his brain. They have only an hour, and then they will return to normal size. The Hole: We don't ask that you stay within the bounds of physics, but at least follow the rules you freaking made up. At the end of the movie, the crew's tiny sub gets destroyed, but the team manages to get out of the guy's body just before they grow back to size. Only problem, they leave the wreckage of their miniaturized submarine behind. As clangers go, that's about as bad as you get. Anyone paying attention to the plot of the movie is wondering right up until the end when the giant submarine wreckage will be bursting out of the guys chest.
It's not quite true that no one cared about this plot hole. When one of sci-fi's greatest writers, Issac Asimov, was hired to write the novelization of the movie (something to keep in mind if your son is ever contemplating a career as a sci-fi writer) he pointed out the hole to the producers. The producers pointed out that Mr. Asimov could shut the hell up and kept it the way it was. Asimov went ahead and changed the ending in the book so it made sense. Hollywood, believing revenge is a dish best served cold, waited 40 years and then turned his book I, Robot into a love story between Will Smith and a pair of converse.
#2.
The Lion King
The Plot: Scar murders his brother and usurps the throne, then Simba returns from exile to avenge his father's death. Also, they're lions. The Hole: For someone who wanted to be king so much, Scar was really bad at it. There's being incompetent, and then there's being so incompetent that you cause the rain to stop and all the rivers and lakes to dry up. We know he let the hyenas run the show and eat whatever they wanted, but come on. What, did they drink the lake?
We know what you're going to say. "Why don't you just point out the fact that lions can't really talk, you pedantic dicks!" But think about the environmental message kids get at the ending. The place was basically a desert, the lions were on the brink of starvation and a huge fire couldn't have helped matters. Simba repairs an entire ecosystem and gets everything back to normal in a couple of years. Obviously a slow and difficult reconstruction period during which most of the tribe dies isn't the most uplifting montage to end a kids' movie with, but it's a little late to spare our feelings at that point, isn't it Disney? Where was that concern when you killed Mufasa, you fuckers?
#1.
Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back
We had to make this number one, not because of the size of the plot hole, but because it's friggin' Star Wars. That's right nerds, the indisputably best one of the series has a pretty gaping hole of its own. The Plot: You know the plot. Don't play that game. The Hole: So there's the famous sequence where Luke gets trained by Yoda on Yoda's shithole of a planet. To break up the sequence, the film cuts to the Millennium Falcon getting chased by the Empire to Lando's cloud city. When they arrive, they get captured, at which point Luke has finished his training. Well, that doesn't work. Were they chased for months? Or was Luke trained in an afternoon? Either we were spared some extended scenes on board the Millennium Falcon featuring starvation and debates about when they'd have to eat Chewbacca, or becoming a Jedi is easier than getting a cub scout merit badge.
The latter explanation seems more plausible, as it just reveals Luke to be an even whinier bitch than he seemed. Talk about ungrateful, he's getting taught God-like abilities in about six hours, and he complains through literally every single one of them. It also means Yoda's insistence that Jedis start their training as young children isn't because the training's such a long arduous process, but because he's amused by the idea of children knowing how to choke each other with their minds.
Now it's true that when Luke tries to leave, Yoda insists the training isn't over. But when Luke returns to Planet Shithole in Return of the Jedi to finish it, Yoda waves him off and tells him there's nothing else to learn. Then it turns out the final test Luke has to pass to become a Jedi is to defeat Darth Vader, the most powerful Jedi in the universe which kind of seems like a huge leap in difficulty after his one-day training session. That'd be like if the final stage of your driving test was to win the Indy 500. So to answer the question, at what point did George Lucas stop paying attention? It looks like it was part way through the second movie. For more movies that are way more disturbing when you actually think about them, check out The 6 Most Depressing Happy Endings in Movie History. Or for movies that you already know suck, but just don't know why, check out 5 Awesome Movies Ruined By Last-Minute Changes. |
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Once again, there isn't a plot hole in "Minority Report", the supposed hole is the whole point of the movie (albeit not communicated effectively).....the Precogs CANNOT read the future accurately or precisely, yet a dystopic futuristic police state uses them like they are completely reliable machines, and harshly punishes its citizens solely based on their jumbled thoughts. That's the point. Right there. Fear Big Brother. Don't dissect precognition as if it's a real thing, it's not, AND THAT'S THE POINT.
@ Saber-Scorpion:
This article is assuming the eternalism view of time, which is one of the more commonly accepted. It states that all of time; past, present, and future exist at once. A time traveler would be able to affect the past or future, but not change it.
Harry Potter is a good example of this. The characters, upon time traveling, affect the outcome of the story, but don't change it. The difference is subtle, but important. Think of Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure, when they have to break into the police station. They are able to assist themselves from the future without having actually succeeded yet. This is because they later travel from the future to the present to affect the changes they need. They change the way things WOULD have occurred, not the way they DID occur.
As for Minority Report, the paradox you describe, that the murder wouldn’t have occurred unless they had predicted it, is in fact not a problem. Think of future predictions as time-traveling information. It can affect the past (or present in this case) but not change it.
Now, the murder of Leo Crowe is not truly premeditated. Tom Cruise does say that he has though about what he would do to the man who took his son, implying murder, but that is not the same as the detailed vision shown by the pre-cogs, just the vague concept of killing him for revenge. And as it is later revealed, Crowe wasn’t the man who killed Tom’s son; so that premeditation didn’t apply to him at all, save for the few moments between Tom entering the room and when he decides not to kill Crowe.
Because the police generally prevent the murders, and even Crowe’s death happens differently than predicted, it is fair to assume that the pre-cogs do not see the future. At best, they only see a possible future. (This requires a different model to time, more of a multi-verse in which timelines are constantly diverging, allowing for multiple possible futures. See the Many Worlds Theory.) But this alone proves that the pre-cogs predictions cannot be trusted to any reliable degree, and fall far short of the “shadow of a doubt” required to lock somebody in jail for a crime (or possibility of a crime.)
I know that is kind of the result of the movie. They show that the pre-cogs CAN be wrong. The problem is, in reality, they are almost ALWAYS wrong. The only way their powers would work as described is if they had some sort of combination of telepathy and precognition that allowed them to read a person’s intentions at some time in the future, presumably moments before being arrested. However, I think that still constitutes a plot hole as that is not the ability described.
Can someone tell me how it is possible in the movie 300, the narrator knows what happens in the final battle between the Spartan army left behind and the remains of the Persian army? I'm quite sure that he was sent away the night before, and since all the Spartans got killed in that last sequence, how the hell did he know what happened? All the Spartans got killed, so I'm sure no one left the battle to tell the story, beside the Persians. And if i was them, i wouldn't like to talk about it... seeing as their got their butts kicked by a tiny army (compared to theirs)
So just raising a little question there... Seemed like the right place to do it
Minority Report does have some plot holes... but not the main ones you guys mentioned. Don't you get that the precogs only predicted POSSIBLE futures, which precrime then tried to PREVENT from happening? Your approach is to future prediction is very fatalistic, whereas the movie hinges on the fact that the future can be changed. You need to fix your thinking there.
Also, the thing about Tom Cruise planning to murder Leo Crow was explained when he said, "Every day for the last eight years, I've thought about two things: what my son would look like if he were alive today, and what I would do if I ever found the man who took him." So obviously he's been plotting this murder for years now.
The real plot hole was this: How would the precogs have predicted a future murder that could never have happened UNLESS the precogs predicted it? It's a time paradox!
There's also a time paradox in Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban: at several points, Harry and his friends would have been captured or killed if they had not been able to travel through time, but they could never have traveled through time unless they had survived to the end of the movie to do so! It just doesn't hold up to logic.
wait a minute... covering up the existence of the Jedi creates a plot hole that is just as big. There are supposed to be thousands of planets that are part of the Republic of who employ the Jedi as policemen (sort of). All the inhabitants of those planets must know about the Jedi. How do you cover up their existence from all those trillion or quadrillion people? I guess the Emporer and Vader had a really busy 18 years of performing mind tricks.
Anyway, I realize the Empire is trying to destroy the credibility of the Jedi. But to cover up its existence is a little far-fetched. Ok, so maybe the general in EP. IV was using the word "ancient" figuratively. Maybe I am just overthinking this thing.
Actually thalliadruid... they never told Luke that his father was a Jedi, they told him that his father was a pilot on a spice freighter.
They refer to the jedi as an ancient religion because they are supposed to cover up its existence entirely. did you not watch the end of episode 3? you know, where all the jedi (minus yoda and obi-wan) get brutally murdered? not to mention anakins whole conversion to the dark side was on the premises that the jedi were weak and didn't use their powers to the fullest. the whole point of his conversion was to save padme from her "inevitable death", which was actually only caused because of his conversion. paradox aside, it would seem to anakin that he couldn't save her because of his fight with obi-wan. obi-wan, considered one of the most powerful jedi, got in the way. don't you think he'd be a little bit bitter about the jedi ruining his little plan?
just saying.
i am a "star wars nerd" but even i admit the gaping plot holes in the series. another one that sticks out in my mind is created by "revenge of the sith". the end of the jedi occurs at the same time luke is born and in "a new hope" maybe 16 to 18 years has passed (judging by luke's age). one of the generals on the death star, who is old enough to be vader's grandfather, refers to the jedi as an ancient religion. in fact, all of the officers looked old enough to have been alive during the jedi era. yet they act as if everything was nothing more that a david copperfield magic show. i guess we can start writing about communism and the cold war right after the chapter about the roman empire.
"Luke is "hidden" on Darth Vader's home planet of Tatooine, using the name of Skywalker and living with his Uncle Ben. And for some reason, Darth Vader, the Dark Lord of the Sith can't find him?"
I always wondered about that one myself. That and the fact they didn't raise him as their own but instead freely spoke of his father the great Jedi. If they wanted him to be a Jedi, they should have gotten him training sooner with Ben. If they wanted to protect him, they should have changed their family name to Dorku and warned him to stay away from old guys named Ben because they are all schizophrenic pedophiles who refer to their penises as light sabers and will want you to play with theirs. Oh, and all girls from Alderaan have syphilis. I'm just saying. Especially ones named Leia.
Actually the Sixth Sense plothole was PART of the plot, as the ghosts were said to be unaware of their fate AND they only see what they want to see. Willis was different as he realized he was a ghost by dealing with ghost.
great plot holes in yo mamma
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Minority Report is a 'classic' movie? Now there's a plot hole for you.
Star Wars is a generational thing, homes. If you grew up with it and connected with the themes and mythology, then they were the ultimate escape.
If you're like 18 and the only real Star Wars experience you have are those corny-ass prequels, then it would seem like some Eragon, Dungeons & Dragons, Sky Captain s**t.
f**k it, I still want a real lightsaber to cut through law enforcement and SWAT police when they come take me to Sing Sing.
damn if you people are so defensive about star wars, please move out of your moms basent and get a real job..
So...on the subject of star wars, a book exists, called shadows of the empire, which explains the period of time between episode V and VI. Luke trains and makes his own lightsaber, the green one. it's interesting, read it
Uh, no... sorry. A) One can hardly cite Bruce Willis' failure to recognize his "ghost status" in "The Sixth Sense" as a plot hole. Willis is a GHOST. We therefore do not know what his existence is really like--in fact, scene to scene he appears to simply "come into existence"--if you notice there is little continuation from one scene to the next (i.e., it's not like we're following Willis through a day-to-day existence, but rather that we're seeing him in bits and pieces). Clearly, it could simply be that he winks in and out of "cognizance" and is never aware of the lack of continuity from one moment he's there to the next. He could, in fact, imagine that his daily life is normal, that he got up in the morning, got dressed, spoke to his wife, went to work, came home, ate dinner and went to bed--when in fact NONE of this is actually happening. Simple. Not a plot hole--just takes a little imagination.
B) Neither is Charles Foster Kane's last word ("rosebud") a plot hole. C'mon for chrissakes! This movie is 68 years old! Do you really think no one would have noticed this by now? It's quite simple---the nurse heard Kane speak---obviously she was right outside the door and enters the seen just as he drops the snowdome. Okay, sure, we're led to believe he does little more than whisper, and she's on the other side of an oak door.... but there's far bigger plot holes to expose than a minor bit of artistic license like THAT.
I thought the Minority Report plot hole was grasping at straws. It's not the greatest movie ever made, but the contradiction of the precogs "predicting" a future that never happens seems more like "an idea" in the movie rather than "a mistake" in the movie. Also, I'm a Cinema Studies student and trust me, outside of the Academy constantly blowing itself, no one really thinks Citizen Kane is the greatest movie ever made. I think Orson Welles was brilliant, and Kane is truly an incredible accomplishment considering what the atmosphere of Hollywood was in the 1940s, but I could name a few Welles films alone that are better than Kane. So next time you have a conversation with a critic and he does suggest that Citizen Kane is the greatest movie ever made, you have my permission to kick the s**t out of that ignorant ass.
"Lucas didn't actually direct Episode V."
...Uh, right, but he /wrote/ it. Directors hardly ever also write the screenplay.
Hint: Utter witticism.
What would James Bond be without the corny puns? A lot better, actually.
There is nothing sadder than a kung fu star in decline.
Yes, they blow up stuff. But, they do it with a message.
Apparently, science likes sex as much as Cracked.
Lobster rights? Good one!
We know because people tried.
Pot makes you a bloodthirsty homosexual pervert.
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moses54fu
How has noone mentioned Independence Day? I mean the aliens are mac compatible. And the alien fighter craft couldn't even keep up with Will Smiths jet but can get into space and to the mothership in a manner of seconds. And why does everyone look at Randy Quaid like he's f*****g crazy when he says he was abducted by aliens? Really? They're currently taking over our planet. I'm pretty sure they exist.
The only way it's cool to leave Independance Day off the list is if you don't consider it a real movie. I guess I'm OK with that though.