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The 30 Most Unsettling German Halloween Costumes
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At first glance this just looks like a fish on end, until you see the face hole in the middle, at which point you realize it’s probably the stupidest costume, ever. Although, watching two of these guys get into a fight would make excellent television.
After misinterpreting several scenes in the Wizard of Oz (1939) Hitler ordered his scientists to begin designing flying monkeys of his own, to match up against what he perceived to be a new Allied super weapon. This costume celebrates that moment, the darkest chapter of the war.
Well, here’s a slap in the balls. Thanks, Germany. You really managed to capture the majesty and grandeur of the subject.
Another symbol of American greatness, reduced to rubble in the hands of German costumiers. This might actually be more insulting than the Statue of Liberty thing.
If this costume doesn’t have a concealed gap in the crotch so that it can be worn while having sex, we will eat our hats.
Judging by the lack of visible air holes, and the very visible erection, this poor guy might be making the embarrassingly public discovery that he’s into auto-erotic asphyxiation.
Costume designers face a choice when designing the head of an animal costume. They can design the entire face, and provide concealed holes for the wearer to see and breathe. Or, they can make no face at all, and just have the wearer’s face stick out, with antlers or bunny ears added to complete the disguise. Or, they can try and do both and end up with a terrifying creation that depicts an enormous bunny trying to swallow a severed human head.
You’ll always remember where you were the day you saw the worst turkey costume ever made.
Yes, those are full-sized adult costumes, designed to look like small children. And no, we don’t have any idea why. Oh sure, we could probably come up with an explanation. But, we wouldn’t be happy writing it, and you wouldn’t be happy reading it. Let’s just leave it be.
In the "making fun of costumes" racket, picking on superhero costumes is considered dirty pool. We inevitably compare them to the real movie costume they’re based on, which are usually worth thousands of dollars and are supported by legions of makeup artists and CGI wizards. That said, here stands the worst Batman costumes ever. Though, it was a nice, subtle touch that the adult wore a pair of smart, Bruce Wayne shoes with the costume, as if he had to get his gear on short notice and forgot to change them. Wait, it gets worse! |
151 Comments
Kiri, I am English and Europeans do have Halloween, we kind of invented it quite a while before your country existed
the one with alf isn't David Hasselhoff, It's Atze, a not very comical white-trash comedian which, sadly, comes from my hometown.
Simone
Just for the record, Kiri, Halloween started in Europe and was brought over here. So the whole "Europeans know how to respect their ancestors" thing is kind of really bullshit.
Rae
"I HAD SEX WITH HILTER!" Dad, go back to bed, you're drunk.
GARY G
I HAD SEX WITH HILTER!
Chokdee
This isn't as funny as I expected it to be. I've seen worse at Carneval. Kids may celebrate Halloween, and maybe a couple of older Kids who like to dress like slutty vampires...but Carnival actually is the costume-thing over here in germany. Try to google "Schnappi" the mostpoplar costume last year...no joke.
Happy_Trails
This site is the funniest thing. Great writing, keep it going.
Shickelgruber
Germany..food, fun and the Fuhrer.
BostonRocco
Kari & Jan, You are both complete idiots. Every country has its good and bad points. I seem to remember that Germany pulled some seriously evil shit in the fairly recent past. So tkae your whining, America bashing and shove it up your ill-informed ass. Andelle, thanks for pointing out the obvious grammatical problems that Kiri seems to have. I know, Kiri, counting can be difficult. Try using your fingers if you get stcuk next time.
awkward....
i thought a couple of them were funny but most a bit creepy and upseting "wierd"
Kaylui
Kiri, even if there wasn't Halloween in Germany, there are still German costumes.
People in costumes?! Man...that's crazy!
ive been on this site far too long, i immediatly noticed batman has a boner without reading it. thank you cracked, i love having this completly mandatory boner-vision super power. you are all assholes.
Andelle
Also... After reading some previous comments. To Kiri. Carnival is not only one letter shorter than Halloween, but they are the same number of syllables.
Andelle
Is it just me, or are the little kid costumes eerily similar to the outfits Bert and Ernie wear?
Uncle Sam
And your proving Germans have no fucking sense of humor, Jan
Jan
Hey, there are people from Germany reading this stuff, and even cracked.com is making the same lame like everybody else does in the US. If u think of Germans having no sense of humor, u re wrong. Actually, all this crap is fucking boring and old. You are just proving that americans are not able to recognize the rest of the world..
Jack
Yea, I lived in Germany for 3 years and they definitely have Halloween.
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rasco
i'm one of the people from germany reading this stuff and i laughed my ass off :)