The 5 Least Anticipated Albums of November 2012
We've reached that point in the year when desperate people with lots of friends and family to please start making really bad decisions. Here are a few of the misguided gifts they'll be purchasing for the music fans in their lives.
Rihanna -- Unapologetic (Diamonds Executive Platinum Box Edition)
The parenthetical portion of this album title reads like the product of market research conducted to determine what words people most associate with having enough expendable cash to justify dropping $250 on a Rihanna album.
So what do you get for that decadent price tag? Robbed. And a View-Master.
John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John -- This Christmas
Just in time for the devastating storm of the same name, John Travolta and the woman who played Sandy in Grease reunite to break Christmas for you.
Aerosmith -- Music from Another Dimension
So, is the dimension referenced in this album title the one where people still give a shit about Aerosmith? Because we absolutely refuse to believe that place exists.
t.A.T.u. -- 200 KM/H in the Wrong Lane (10th Anniversary Edition)
That's right, it's time to celebrate the 10th anniversary of the album that has that song you heard on TRL that one morning when you were getting ready for work. You know the one. The video looked like it was maybe being performed by the Eastern European sex trafficking scene's most talented duo, which we're pretty sure it was.
And then one week later, celebrate the 10th anniversary of the moment when you forgot that song, album or group ever existed by doing it all over again.
The Rolling Stones -- GRRR
The Rolling Stones released a greatest hits album in 2002. They released a new studio album in 2005. There is one song from that album on this collection. There's also a gorilla with gigantic lips on the album cover. This basically doubles as a greatest hits collection of all the worst ideas a band could possibly have at one time. The deluxe version probably comes with a girlfriend who has strong opinions on the direction of the next album.