The CRTC had to review the request, because apparently the three erotica channels had performed "instances of apparent non-compliance" to the CRTC's guidelines. How so? They failed to reach the required 35 percent Canadian content, meaning erotica channels in Canada are required to feature 8.5 hours of Canadian-made porn per day, and none of the three erotica channels were doing it. This is smashing news for all the unemployed Rob Ford impersonators out there.
The Queen Is Really Sick of the Police Sticking Their "Sticky Fingers" in Her Royal Nuts
Last December, a scandalous phone-hacking trial involving the royal family and Buckingham Palace littered British headlines. During the many subsequent trials, one particularly hilarious memo from back in 2005 was revealed. Apparently, the queen was really fucking pissed that the palace officers kept eating her royal nuts.
Chris Jackson/Getty Images Entertainment/Getty Images
"Don't worry, Your Majesty. We still have plenty of deez."
The best part was how she figured out they were doing it. The queen has a longstanding order for staff to leave various nuts out in bowls for her to nibble on, because it turns out Great Britain's royal head is actually a squirrel. But when she noticed that her nuts were disappearing, she started marking the bowls to see when the levels dipped. It turns out it was when the police were around. So the queen sent a memo to the palace officers and reminded them to "keep their sticky fingers out." God save the queen. And her nuts.
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