24 Movies And Shows That Said "Yeah, Sure" To Ill-Conceived Merch

These will make you long for the subtle restraint of Darth Vader bed sheets.
24 Movies And Shows That Said "Yeah, Sure" To Ill-Conceived Merch

George Lucas famously made the genius move of retaining all the merchandise rights for every Star Wars thing. Then he presumably dug a swimming pool to hold the truckloads of cash that poured in. Unfortunately, every franchise since then has been angling for some of that sweet merchandising cheddar, so we wind up with some truly ill-conceived official products.

Things like ...

Alien

The A L I E N franchise is exploring new avenues for merchandising with this friendly plush toy FACEHUGGER. You know... for kids!
Ah yes, that timeless holiday classic... #allmark KEEPSAKE SAON PREDATOR
RXCKY was a winner... but some of the franchise merchandise took a hit. ROCKY For those who want to play with Rocky's meat. *Bloody Butcher's $1976 X
CHPAZ A27Ric Heroically taking on evil using nothing but his will and his trusted.. .. slow cooker? CRACKEDOON
24 Movies And Shows That Said Yeah, Sure To Ill-Conceived Merch
CRACKED COM Is there any better expression PHANTASM SERL ORNAMENT SENTINEL of the spirit of the holidays than this ornament commemorating the bloodsuc
24 Movies And Shows That Said Yeah, Sure To Ill-Conceived Merch
OWeers Disney 3+ MUPPETS THE the WHAT PHALLUS! AWEMSME BEAKER CRACKEDCON
If you're going to have sex, do it with official Watchmen condoms. WE'RE SOCIETY'S. ONLY PROTECTION. WATCHMEN 03.06.09 Well, maybe don't. Not just bec
24 Movies And Shows That Said Yeah, Sure To Ill-Conceived Merch
This C-3PO tape dispenser from sigma is awesome, right? Just look at his face.
CRACKED CO MOBT WALT DsNEYS Feyue OTON OAMATIC Were your kids traumatized by this 1957 Disney classic? WATDISNEY ESS PARKEX TMOROTHY MSRNE Then buy:..
CRACKED.COM S U P E R MARIOBROS released a coloring book with some questionable artwork. You'll certainly enjoy coloring this artwork depicting Yoshi

The Matrix

24 Movies And Shows That Said Yeah, Sure To Ill-Conceived Merch
24 Movies And Shows That Said Yeah, Sure To Ill-Conceived Merch
Mini Na LcHUEH Faconsde rcuers The OP CELABRATES MMT Ma e Mewwek THEMOTION PICTURE RELEASEI A NA LACOU ONLY IN THEATERS Sne Now O-PI What better Way c
SHREK. TWINKIES Siek2 Hostess Twinkies BRAND Twinkies GREEN Coupon Inside! OGRE FILLING CREAMY TASTE! GREAT SAME Golden Sponge Cake with Creamy Fillin
The Passion of the Christ crucifixion nail necklace TR ASSION Apparently a crucifix wasn't enough for Mel Gibson, SO he gave fans of his film a consta
Finally, a shaving kit toy for your Transformers-loving kids! GROCI n TADE sa BATH SET FURTERE AGES: se TEAO FOITEA MIOL LAIIL Fasi 5SAL InCLUDES: MOL
Celebrate the Academy Founag Award winning FARGO Bhan Ces PolyGram Video with this charming commemorative snow- snow-globe (and you won't have to spen
Dr. Seuss' I speak for LORAX The the trees! weirdly partnered with HP printers... hp ...offering activity pages about the environment on the HP websit
LAVA BERRY EXPLOSION POP-TARTS The berry flavor gives YOU that extra energy to take the high ground while suppressing the memories of your lava-burnt
You can now spend eternity Spock-style with this new Star Trek coffin. CRACKED.COM
AVENGERS MARHETING FOR FOUR HEROIC MENS COLDGNES AVENiERS INCLUDED A WORTHY SISr MARKVE PATRIOT COLLECTION OF FRAGRANCES, LEADING US TO WONDER, what t
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