Death is lurking around every corner. Like, seriously -- none of you are safe. Mother nature, outer space, safety lessons, survival tips -- all of them have a hidden agenda to make you into a carcass.

So as part of our state mandated community service, we enlisted our readers to help us help you survive this cold, unforgiving planet. The winner is below, but first the runners up.

Entry by T. S. Obiech

HOT TUB TIME MACHINE ? MORE LIKE HOT TUB DEATH MACHINE! DANGER CHEMICAL POISONING from hot tubs (and pools) HAZARDOUS sends THOUSANDS of people CHEMIC

Entry by Scott Laffey

Love your electric blanket? So does the Reaper. Not only have they contributed to tens of thousands of house fires, overuse has led to instances of he

Entry by AChappell

Toothache? Better grab some Anbesol! Or not... The active ingredient, Benzocaine, has been known to cause a condition called methemoglobinemia, which

Entry by mkad

Hungarian authorities became suspicious when they realized that Nagyrev, a small village outside of Budapest, was using more flypaper than the rest of

Entry by JasonGaston

They killed 37 people in 17 years... BEWARE THE VENDING MACHINES acola SPLAT CRACKED COM

Entry by SigBab

In September 1980, a Florida-bound commuter plane crashed, killing 34 people onboard. In February 1996, a Turkish airliner carrying 189 people stalled

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There are FIVE chances for you to win some cold, hard Internet dollars. Click on the prompt that catches your fancy, and post your entry in the thread. Or submit to all of them and increase your chances of becoming rich and famous. (Photoplasty winners gets 10,000 pennies, GIF winners get 15,000 and macro winners get 20,000!)

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