15 of the Best Jokes and Moments from ‘Saturday Night Live’ Monologues

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We laughed. We cried. Now can we laugh again, please?

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The Five Best Recurring ‘Kids in the Hall’ Characters

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15 Horrifying Ways Sex Can Go Wrong

By:: Ryan Menezes; Cracked Writers

November 24, 2020

15 Horrifying Ways Sex Can Go Wrong

All of these stories are true and are enough to make us want to chain up our genitals for life. Sure, sex can do your body a world of good. Other times, it can curse you with afflictions so weird and scary that you may as well have banged the devil himself.

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15 Horrifying Ways Sex Can Go Wrong - No, we’re not talking about being allergic to your partner’s semen. We’re talking about being allergic to your o — Source: National Library of Medicine

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15 Horrifying Ways Sex Can Go Wrong - Air blown into the vagina during oral sex squeezed through the Fallopian tubes into the bloodstream, leading to — Source: Society of Laparoendoscopic Surgeons

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15 Horrifying Ways Sex Can Go Wrong - Have sex too rigorously, and a testicle might rotate, constricting the spermatic cord. This cuts off the blood s — Source: Mayo Clinic

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15 Horrifying Ways Sex Can Go Wrong - A 29-year-old woman went to the hospital complaining of missed periods. Doctors extracted from her vagina a 3-in — Source: American Journal of Forensic Medicine and Pathology

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15 Horrifying Ways Sex Can Go Wrong - Paramedics have to regularly intervene when men insert their penises in pool suction fittings and get them stuck — Source: Tampa Bay Times

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15 Horrifying Ways Sex Can Go Wrong - After a passionate kissing session, a woman arrived in the hospital deaf in one year. The reduced pressure in th — Source: Reuters

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15 Horrifying Ways Sex Can Go Wrong - The ancient Greeks wrote of rhaphanidosis, a punishment for adultery. The cuckold was to thrust a radish into th — Source: Women of Ancient Greece

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15 Horrifying Ways Sex Can Go Wrong - After a night with a partner, a New Zealand woman found herself partially paralyzed because of a hickey. The nec — Source: NBC News

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15 Horrifying Ways Sex Can Go Wrong - First the good news: getting your penis stuck in a ring generally does not lead to amputation. But the bad news: — Source: Netter Collection of Medical Illustrations

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15 Horrifying Ways Sex Can Go Wrong - Yes, it can happen. If an erect penis suddenly bends, the result may be a loud cracking sound, dark bruising of — Source: Mayo Clinic

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15 Horrifying Ways Sex Can Go Wrong - The antidepressant Clomipramine has the side effect orgasms with each yawn, in both women and men. It can also h — Source: LA Times

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15 Horrifying Ways Sex Can Go Wrong - A couple in New York suffered a spinal fracture, a broken thigh, and severed toes from having sex. Of course, th — Source: Chicago Reader

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15 Horrifying Ways Sex Can Go Wrong - A woman kept collecting her boyfriend’s semen by nabbing their used condoms. She used it to get in-vitro. He onl — Source: ABC news

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15 Horrifying Ways Sex Can Go Wrong - Doctors have recorded repeated instances of people going blind thanks to vigorous sex. It has to do with how mov — Source: National Library of Medicine

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15 Horrifying Ways Sex Can Go Wrong - It was bad when a random hookup ended in a can of body spray shoved up a man’s ass. It was worse when he went to — Source: New Zealand Herald

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