25 Completely Pointless Lies You Can't Stop Telling

Turns out all your pants are on fire, for literally no reason.
25 Completely Pointless Lies You Can't Stop Telling

Cracked pays people to make smart memes. Visit the Photoplasty and Pictofacts Workshop to get in on it.

We all feel horrified (and a little self-righteous) when somebody in power tells a blatant, pointless, public lie. But the thing is, we all tell dumb lies all the time, for really stupid reasons. Don't believe us? Have a look at all these examples our readers were able to come up with.

All these stretchers were told by functioning adults, with full awareness that they're lies, and knowing full well that they'd have absolutely no consequences.

It seems pointless to lie about my weight on my driver's license because everyone knows it's a lie... DMV 3NC CALIFORNIA LICENSE DMV DRIVER 18021994 V
I'm a solid seven, baby!' GRAU Men know their measurement down to the micrometer, they know that they'll get found out, but they keep setting their
GRAGKEDCOM When my friends talk about something famous, common that I don't know of, just say that I've heard about it or ask them to remind me. I
OI love it! I'lI come back for it later. CRACKED.COM No I won't. can't actually afford it.
It delicious, was but I'm stuffed. As though they can't tell I'm just being polite about a meal I hardly touched.
CRACKEDCO Any problems finding the place? No, your directions were perfect!
If someone complains they're tired, I say me too Somehow it seems like bragging to admit I got a good 8 hours.
Most Fridays, O like to stop at the bakery and buy a dozen donuts. 0 always tell the clerk that O am taking them to work in the morning. That is a big
CRACKEDGO COM KWBY/COUNT GRRTH BROOKS 44111 ITolS THE THUNDER ROLLS NO FENCES NO FENCES (girlfriend) Is this station ok? (me) Sure, it's fine... AIC F
CRACKED CON BAKERY When it's my turn to bring goodies for game night, I always take them in my own container instead of the store's box. I'm not reall
Man, if you don't play this game on the highest difficulty, what's the point in even playing, am I right? Reality wopfensiin THE NEWORDER CANI PLAY,
Even If I had a real CrAPPY day, will still lie and say that I had a great day SO that the other person won't have to feel bad for me. CRACKED COM
On my way, I say, although I'm already 30 minutes late and nowhere near ready to leave home. CRACKED COM
I must have seen that film 15 times. When i was young I walked 10 miles to school. I stayed up until 3am to finish the assignment. Why do I alwa
CRACKEDO COM It's just the weirdest thing 1 how computers can glitch out at random times. 10111 nC3 UCE RT.'M UAA I must have said this a million ti
Yeah, I totally read that a few years ago. If I listened to the audiobook, I just say I read it So I don't have CRACK deal with judgement from the p
I wasn't asleep. I was just resting my eyes. Why would I lie about that? Since when do JUST eyeballs need rest? Am I ashamed of sleeping? CRACKED.CO
25 Completely Pointless Lies You Can't Stop Telling
I lie to cab drivers when I'm embarrassed by my actual destination. condom not Just DISCOUNT condors massaget oils OPET ADLOTTT lingene. adult DN com
When I need something three days before payday, I ask the clerk if I can get rid of the change that is weighing me down. 35 Do I think she won't kno
GRAOY Hey, can I get these leftovers boxed up? I give leftovers to homeless people if I see thems I've done this a few times, sure, but I'm probably g
I'm buying this for my kid. Sony, my LITTLE OCKILER R OD rEC FOIL CUE ONY PLUS 1 HEA I don't even CRACKED.COM have a kid.
I lie through my teeth, literally, to my dentist. Of course brush every day doc. As if the guy with the MD in dentistry can't tell by looking. CRACK
Whenever someone ends a statement with the question You know what I mean? I will answer with 'Yes., even though I don't know what the hell they me
Scroll down for the next article
Forgot Password?