I wish I could tell you that non-housebroken patrons were a freak occurrence, but it actually became such a huge problem for us that the Mohegan Sun now has an environmental services team just to come in and take our soiled chairs away for deep-cleaning. Unfortunately, sometimes we don't spot/smell the problem in time. I have a patron who once sat down for a game, only to find poop on the chair from a previous player. One time a security guard spotted a customer walking out of the casino, s**t plopping out of her pant leg with every step.
Remember, this didn't happen in some shady, smoke-filled, back-alley joint. This is the Mohegan Sun we're talking about -- a huge, elegant casino with style and ambiance.
The brown-and-yellow motif really cuts down on cleaning costs.
I recall one customer who found a happy medium between defiling our chairs and taking a break from gambling: He just stood up and discreetly pissed into a slot machine coin tray. Keep that in mind next time you start scooping up your winnings.
Gambling is a very exciting thing, and sometimes that excitement gets all mixed up in sexual arousal: We've caught guys finger-banging their girlfriends under the roulette table and ladies giving handjobs at the poker table. What many patrons don't realize is that almost all casinos have damn near 100 percent camera coverage. At the Mohegan Sun, this has allowed us to record everything from nip-slips to elevator sex to people banging in the slot machine corner. I'm pretty sure that our surveillance guys can't even look at porn anymore because it feels too much like work.
"Ugh, that position would require so much paperwork."