THE LATEST FROM

Pauli Poisuo

Columnist, writer, general squeaky cog in the Cracked machine. Just pronounce it the way you want. I'm not your dad, I can't tell you what to do.
Hit me up:
facebook.com/pages/Pauli-Poisuo/443030122506223
twitter.com/poisuo
theunpronounceable@gmail.com
http://www.cracked.com/forums/topic/165519/the-unpronounceable-pauli-poisuos-column

8 Ridiculous Sex Toys for the Budget-Conscious

Humans love sex, and humans love toys. Sex toys are a thing. We tend to think they're alright, too ... most of the time.

Authors: By Pauli Poisuo
Published: June 19, 2014

4 Video Games That Desperately Need a Movie Adaptation

Authors: By Pauli Poisuo
Published: June 14, 2014

The 10 Most Unintentionally Terrifying Statues in the World

These statues prove that a whole bunch of sculptors are clearly using every single ounce of their talent to troll the world as hard as they possibly can.

Authors: By Pauli Poisuo
Published: June 05, 2014

The 5 Most Ridiculous Products Made for Crotch Maintenance

I'm not saying that taking care of our fun bits is a bad thing. For the most part, it's the best thing. It's just that some of the stuff we subject them to seems a tad ... overkill.

Authors: By Pauli Poisuo
Published: May 29, 2014

4 Upcoming Reboots That Must Be Stopped

Note: There are several spoilers for eons-old plot twists in this article. May anyone who does not realize and accept this be eaten by a grue.

Authors: By Pauli Poisuo
Published: May 22, 2014

4 Insane Conspiracy Theories That Need Their Own Movie

Why don't we check out some movie-worthy theories out there and see if Hollywood will bite?

Authors: By Pauli Poisuo
Published: May 15, 2014

5 Outrageous Archaeological Hoaxes That Fooled the Experts

The desire to get an assload of money without working for it too hard brings out all the best forgeries.

Authors: By Pauli Poisuo
Published: May 08, 2014

5 Advanced Weapons Clearly Invented by a 6-Year-Old

When you venture beyond the obvious things that go bang and boom, you'll find an array of non-lethal weapons that appear to draw their inspiration directly from the mind of a child.

Authors: By Pauli Poisuo
Published: May 01, 2014

The 4 Jerks Everyone Has to Deal With

Let's see if we can counter some simple yet persistent dick moves we face daily.

Authors: By Pauli Poisuo
Published: April 24, 2014

The 6 Most Undeserving Lottery Winners in History

For most people winning the lottery means a life of living it easy. For these morons it meant a life of being a butthead.

Authors: By Pauli Poisuo
Published: April 17, 2014

5 Terrifying Sex Toys That Prove We're Overthinking Sex

Sometimes when I sit in front of the fire in my smoking jacket, idly sipping Scotch and browsing through the latest issue of 'Sexy Sex Sexology on Sexual Sexiness,' it occurs to me that we, as a society, are totally overthinking boning.

Authors: By Pauli Poisuo
Published: April 10, 2014

4 Crappy Ideas Everyone Thinks Are Brilliant

Certain types of more ... active ideas tend to end up in pretty much everyone's head at some point. Here are four of the worst offenders.

Authors: By Pauli Poisuo
Published: April 03, 2014

The 6 Greatest Life Hacks for Handling Criticism

Authors: By Pauli Poisuo
Published: March 15, 2014

The 11 Most Disturbing Tourist Attractions Around the World

No other art form can quite match the surprise factor of a truly beautiful statue. Or a truly hideous one.

Authors: By Pauli Poisuo
Published: March 08, 2014

4 Ways the Internet Is Creeping into the Real World

The Internet is not going to wait for us to get our heads around its intricacies. It's far too busy wrapping its own tendrils around the real world.

Authors: By Pauli Poisuo
Published: March 06, 2014

The 6 Most Ridiculous Products Ever Made for Boobs

It's almost like these designers' familiarity with boobies came from Barbie dolls and RedTube.

Authors: By Pauli Poisuo
Published: February 18, 2014

5 Life Lessons You Learn from Being Bullied

During my years in the dog pound I had plenty of chances to learn the gentle art of coping with bully bullshit, a skill that has been extremely handy later in life.

Authors: By Pauli Poisuo
Published: February 11, 2014

4 Real Products That Prove We Can Ruin Anything

Making a defective product is ridiculously easy.

Authors: By Pauli Poisuo
Published: February 04, 2014

6 Creepy Artificial Animals You Won't Believe Exist

Quick: animals or robots? As in, which of them will be the first to get tired of humanity's bullshit and rise against us? Trick question: It's both!

Authors: By Pauli Poisuo
Published: January 30, 2014

5 Ways Your Brain Is Turning You into a Jerk

We've said it before and we'll say it again: Your brain loves to screw around with you.

Authors: By Pauli Poisuo
Published: January 22, 2014