25 Recent News Bites About Biden's Pants, Artificial Intelligence, And A Radioactive Elementary School

In the wake of the Supreme Court's recent decision to reverse Roe v Wade, more and more people across the United States are now looking for vasectomies. This surge in demand is due to people wanting to take matters into their own hands when it comes to preventing pregnancy – and one mobile clinic, called the “Nutcracker”, even has a program offering 60 free snips over three days! In only slightly more odd news, Rick Caruso, a billionaire real estate developer and candidate for Los Angeles mayor, recently made headlines after declaring that he's not white - he's actually Italian. This claim came during an awkward debate moment. And, in only slightly less slimy matters, it turns out here may be a new way to protect against HIV - personal lubricant made from cow mucus! Though there's no clear answer yet if this method works, it holds some promise. And besides, what better way to get your partner on board than by saying ‘I have lube made from cow mucus’? Really, we can't imagine anything sexier.

25 'The Midnight Club' breaks jump scare record.

Netflix's The Midnight Club broke the record for most scripted jump scares in a television episode. CRACKED.COM The series is based on Christopher Pike's 1994 novel of the same name and the first episode fea- tures 21 jumpscares. If it's not good, it'll at least be mildly startling. — GWR / YouTube

24 Alligator caught swimming in the ocean in Florida.

An alligator had to be removed from the ocean off a Florida beach. CRACKED.COM Is this an obscure Flor- ida law we aren't privy to? Are alligators not allowed in the ocean? Surely they were in there long before we were. — UPI / Wikipedia

23 Biden Did Not Wear His Pants Backwards in Puerto Rico.

A rumor circulated around TikTok that Biden wore his pants backwards while visiting Puerto Rico. CRACKED.COM Не wasn't, and the evi- dence is a grainy video still that was easily disproved with additional footage from the event. Kris Kross could not be reached to make a statement. — Snopes / Wikipedia

22 Republican Says Lobster Regulators ‘Want to Rape You and Your Family’

A GOP candidate for Congress in Maine said that lobster regulators want to rape you and your family. CRACKED.COM Ed Thelander said during a rally that the National Oce- anic and Atmospheric Ad- ministration is asking you to pick a child, and urged the crowd, Don't negoti- ate with a rapist. — Vice / Wikipedia

21 Radioactive waste found at Missouri elementary school

A contaminated creek in Missouri is making an elementary school radioactive. 1.008PL000 - UA Junior O DAEOA DA PUPUPLEM - OA OADADOAE O OAE OAE OAP OA OAEP nine P أسيلة 42 CRACKED.COM PLORIO 03 الأوم Jana Elementary School in suburban St. Louis sits in the flood plain of Coldwater Creek, which was contami- nated by nuclear waste from weapons production during World War II. — AP News / Wikipedia

20 'Eggo Nog' Is Coming to Put a Breakfast Twist on Holiday Drinking

Food and Wine / Unsplash

19 Fossil fuel protesters throw tomato soup on Van Gogh's 'Sunflowers' in London gallery

Protestors doused a Van Gogh painting with tomato soup. CRACKED.COM Van Gogh's Sunflowers was ok, as it was under protective glass the entire time. The protestors aim to show how destroying a painting gains more atten- tion than destroying the planet. — CNN / Wikimedia

18 Vermont man dies after crashing into cow at over 100 mph

A man in Vermont crashed into a cow going 100 mph and died. CRACKED.COM Police were notified of a car that struck a cow in the roadway. A nurse was re- portedly on scene and said both the driver and the bo- vine had died, but the pas- senger was uninjured. — News10 / Wikimedia

17 After fat bear fraud, bear named "747" again crowned chunky champion

The Fat Bear Week competition was rocked with cheating allegations. CRACKED.COM Weighing in at nearly one ton, 747 was crowned king for the second time in three years. Even though someone had spammed the contest with fraudulent votes, orga- nizers were able to suss out legit ballots. — Alaska Public / Wikipedia

16 A 140-Year-Old Pair of Levi’s Was Found in a Mine Shaft. They Just Sold for Over $87,000.

The most vintage pair of Levi's sold for $87,000. CRACKED.COM The pair of jeans were found in a mine shaft and are 140-years-old. What's baffling is that they appear to be the same design you'd see in any trendy boutique today-complete with frays and weathering. — Yahoo / Wikimedia

15 Smugglers claim boat shortages affecting crossings

People smuggling gangs in France claim there is a growing shortage of small boats to make the crossings. CRACKED.COM Migrant smugglers warn that prices will increase, otherwise they won't make any profit. Supply chain issues and inflation affect everyone, appar- ently. — BBC / Wikipedia

14 Ferrari 458 owned by law firm that specializes in auto accidents crashes into wall at car show

A law firm specializing in car accidents crashed a Ferrari 458 at a car show. CIHGS CRACKED.COM The Ferrari owned by The Hadi Law Firm was filmed accelerating, jumping a curb, and crashing into an em- bankment as the exotic car exited a car show. — Tire Meets Road / Wikipedia

13 GMC Terrain Headlight Recall Fix Is Just a Piece of Tape

GMC is meeting a headlight recall with a Headlamp Applique Kit that is just a piece of tape. GMC CRACKED.COM At certain angles, the NHT- SA says the car's head- lights are too bright. To dim the brightness, GMC is using a foggy little adhe- sive patch applied to the lens of the headlamp. A lit- eral Band-Aid solution. — The Drive / Wikipedia

12 Students Are Using AI to Write Their Papers, Because Of Course They Are

AI is now being used by students to write their papers for them. 3 - 4 lim CR VNEN ,to Xn 3 x n2-2n+x И. Be {yn} off yn neN, A>0,=> lim5A=1 n/ 4K+4 Rx 5 xip /n2.n-1 sayag n2-2n23 VneNincyn <Zn nano 4 C Xn Уп Cx N-R lokal max, {y_3 f(x),ff и n -13 13 {=n] g)<E */3m R X, Lok Lim 30 , --R I min min n г54. { R n+1 . и xn <Yn 6 Zn 13 II JL n-o П-201 CRACKED.COM One anonymous user says they would send their homework prompts to the AI and it — Vice / Wikimedia

11 Equifax surveilled 1,000 remote workers, fired 24 found juggling two jobs

Equifax fired 24 remote workers who were discovered to be juggling two jobs. 1550 PEACHTREE STREET EQUIFAX EQUI 1550 CRACKED.COM Equifax used one of its own products, The Work Num- ber, to help it suss out who was holding down multiple jobs simultaneously in what they called Project Home Alone. — Ars Technica / Wikipedia

10 AT&T ‘committed to ensuring’ it never bribes lawmakers again after $23 million fine

AT&T assures us they are committed to never bribing lawmakers again. AT&T GRACKED COM AT&T Illinois will pay $23 million for their influence over a bill, and will coop- erate with the govern- ment's investigation. They reportedly even pin- ky swore to be good little boys from here on out. — The Verge / Wikipedia

9 Calls to feed contraceptive pills to aggressive seagulls are flawed, says BirdWatch Ireland

The plan to feed contraceptive pills to seagulls has been called problematic. CRACKED.COM Politicians in Ireland have suggested leaving pill-laced pellets for aggressive gulls that attack people for their food, but some of the birds are protected species and the laced food may affect other animals. — Joe / Wikipedia

8 Manhattan congressional candidate publishes a porn video to highlight his sex positive platform

A Manhattan congressional candidate made a porn video to amplify his sex positive platform. CRACKED COM 53-year-old Mike Itkis released the sex tape with adult performer Ni- cole Sage as a conver- sation piece, and called it a huge learning expe- rience. — City and State NY / Wikipedia

7 Crowded Maryland restaurant stays open after customer dies in the restroom

A restaurant in Maryland stayed open even after a customer died in the women's bathroom. CRACKED.COM Jasper's didn't close when the situation unfolded and continued to seat custom- ers. A curtain was put up around the women's re- stroom, and the men's room was converted into a unisex restroom. — NBC / Unsplash

6 New Zealand proposes taxing cow burps to reduce emissions.

New Zealand wants to tax the greenhouse gasses that farm animals produce from burping. CRACKED COM Prime Minister Jacinda Ard- ern said money raised from the proposed levy will be pumped back into the indus- try to finance new technolo- gies, research and incentive payments for farmers. — BBC / Pixabay

5 Channel 4 buys painting by Hitler – and may let Jimmy Carr destroy it.

Channel 4 bought a painting by Hitler and will let the audience decide whether to destroy it. CRACKED.COM The station also bought works by Pablo Picasso, convicted pedophile Rolf Harris and sexual abuser Eric Gill, with the intention that a live audience will determine if host Jimmy Carr smashes them up. — CNN / Wikipedia

4 Walker scolded for flashing badge in middle of Georgia debate.

Herschel Walker flashed a fake badge during a debate to prove he worked with law enforcement. CRACKED.COM Sen. Raphael Warnock said, I've never pretended to be a police officer, prompting Walker to dis- play an honorary sheriff's badge. Не was scolded for producing a prop which was against debate rules. — WYTV / Wikipedia

3 Personal lubricant made from cow mucus may protect against HIV.

Lube made from cow mucus may protect against HIV. CRACKED COM Here's how it works: you say I have lube made from COW mu- cus, and your partner says, we will never have sex ever again. Safe and sound! — New Scientist / Wikipedia

2 Los Angeles mayoral candidate Rick Caruso declares he's not white because he's Italian.

An LA mayoral candidate says he's not white, he's Italian. CRACKED.COM Rick Caruso insisted he's actually Latin in an awk- ward debate moment. Caruso is a billionaire real estate developer running against Karen Bass, who seeks to be the city's first black female mayor. — NBC / Wikipedia

1 US clinics offer free vasectomies in wake of supreme court’s Roe reversal.

A mobile vasectomy clinic called the Nutcrackeris offering free snips. Plam D ParenthooB Center The Carol Whitehill PRO-CHOICE CLINIC ESCORT CRACKED.COM There has been a surge in demand for vasectomies after the reversal of Roe V Wade, so Planned Parent- hood and a physician with a mobile cord-cutter are offering 60 free snips over three days in St Louis. — The Guardian / Wikipedia