'So what do we do about this whole international crime syndicate still hanging around?' 'Meh. Roll to credits.'
If they greenlit Schindler's List today, it'd be about an assassin named Schindler, his large-breasted sidekick, and his list of high profile targets. In 3D. POSTproduction 3D.
WARNING: The following article contains historical speculation from a comedy website.
Darth Vader's wakeboarding montage would really have broken the flow of Empire. Still, we wish they included it in the theatrical release.
Hollywood's most frustrating films to watch are the ones that are one character away from being perfect. Whether it's a wacky sidekick or a sassy kid, they always suck the life out of the film.
Each form of media has its own unique lifecycle.
Sometimes people put foreign languages in movies. Aside from this being treasonously un-American, they hardly ever do it right.
Why do some filmmakers try to turn their kung fu masterpiece into something more? Apparently to make us lose our shit laughing.
Kids: Use Your Comic Book Prize to Fight Gorillas!
Hey, you can't let something like a little death get in the way. There's money to be made
Writing movies is hard. Mainly because you, the audience, are so demanding. That's why we end up with such convoluted plots as these.