Using Occupy Wall Street to Pick Up Chicks
According to some popular search engine listings I've just scoured while looking for article ideas, there are an awful lot of people out there right now who are alone and furious with bankers and interested in Asian teens. Assuming that the rest of the Internet is capable of delivering the Asian teen portion of that wishlist, I shall take it upon myself to satisfy the other two, preferably at the same time, much in the same way I could never do with Asian teens.
I guess we'd play Starcraft or something, and I blow at Starcraft.So then, loneliness and bank-fury. Even addressing these issues one at a time is fraught with difficulties. The problems with loneliness have been well documented elsewhere on this site, and short of pooping in an ATM vestibule, few ways of expressing displeasure at a bank have been available to the bank-furious. And there certainly hasn't been any possibility of addressing both those issues at once. "I'm not getting any younger," these desperate souls would say, hating Goldman Sachs, "but where can I find time to meet my soulmate when I'm researching income inequality factoids?"
"Are those space pants? Because I can see your ass is angry at exorbitant levels of student debt."And then the Occupy Wall Street protests came along. While protesting the greed and unfairness present in today's economy, these events have provided a fertile ground for the young, urban unprofessional to connect with available local singles for chatting,
For more reasons why Chris isn't fit for society, check out 10 Helpful Tips For Bending The Masses to Your Will and Cracked Interviews the Jonas Brothers.
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