So a Satellite Just Hit Your House
What just happened?A satellite just hit your house!Holy shit!I know!
No I see what you're saying.Because that satellite would have torn your legs off and set them on fire. Sheila only threatened to do that - she never had the stones to go through with it.
You've just been the victim of a hyperkinetic teabagging.Is everyone OK?Yes, everyone who lives in your house is fine. That's just you incidentally. I know that. I don't know why I asked.It's ok. You've had a hard time adjusting since Sheila left. Don't worry about it. Unlike the satellite damage, the hurt will pass. How bad is it?You've just spent the past three hours crying in your car, so pretty bad, I guess.No, how bad is the satellite damage?You know the vertical surfaces of your house which hold up the roof bit?The walls? Yes.Those aren't really there any more, or perhaps are there, but no longer vertical. In any event, they're no longer doing their job of keeping the roof aloft. You were lucky you were crying in your car when this happened. I mean, not that lucky, obviously, what with all that internal pain.
Since then though, they've been pretty steady and sober.Anyways, there are bound to be tons of buyers out there for satellite technology. You could easily make back enough to cover your losses.