If Time Machines Were Built By Real Men

You can tell a lot about a person by how they use their time machine. Too often we see chrononauts waste their awesome power to perform at a high school dance or looper a looplooper of themselves. Rip Hunter ... Time Master didn't fret around time like an a*****e. All day he was riding giant crabs or jump-kicking aliens, and his three sidekicks didn't give a s**t that none of it had anything to do with time. If Rip Hunter told their time sphere to go back to the era of giant crabs, it only said, "f*****g VROOM."

His adventures were, without exception, an unrelenting assault of fists and nonsense. Rip Hunter handled time travel with all the grace of Bill Cosby repositioning a lover, which is a great joke after you learn he uses a snow shovel. Rip left ray guns with cavemen. He punched out world leaders. He once collected Cleopatra, Helen of Troy, and other historical women just to see who was prettiest and it instantly turned into a catfight. The point is, he's the best and you're in luck, because I've uncovered a classic Rip Hunter ... Time Master adventure never seen before. Man Comics presents:

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Seanbaby invented being funny on the Internet. Geniuses play his critically acclaimed game Calculords on their mobile devices. You can follow him on Twitter.

For more of his manly manness, see 24 Video Game Covers To Double Your Testosterone or If Men's Magazines Were Way Manlier.

Also learn how you can technically catch up in age to your parents in 7 Theories On Time That Would Make Doc Brown's Head Explode, and find out why everything in the past would be virtually inedible to you in 6 Time Travel Realities Doc Brown Didn't Warn Us About.

Subscribe to our YouTube channel to see the worst hit in time-traveling history in How Not To Go Back In Time To Kill Hitler, and watch other videos you won't see on the site!

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