If The Internet Is A Grade School Cafeteria We're All Stepping On Our Food And Eating It: The Daily Nooner (EST)!

Drinking Liquid Nitrogen When I was a little kid, I used to do all kinds of stupid things to impress people. In 2nd grade I told a bunch of people that my dad held the Guinness World Record for "Best Driver" (and that he trained for it by playing Spy Hunter). In 3rd grade I told a kid that I wrote the lyrics to "Sweet Child O' Mine" for Axl Rose. I had a jacket with all these patches on it, and one of them said "AIRBORNE" on it; I told everyone that a pilot gave it to my mom after she gave birth to me on an airplane. I stuck gum in my hair at some kid's house like three times in a row because he dared me to. At first his mom tried to get it out with peanut butter, but that didn't work very well, so she eventually gave up and cut it out with a pair of scissors. When I did it again a week later, she didn't bother with the peanut butter. The third time I'm pretty sure she just kicked me out of her house for being stupid. I used to gather a small crowd in the cafeteria at school, step on my food, and then eat it. I could go on, but you get the point: I was a weird kid who was willing to do basically anything for attention. I've matured quite a bit since then, of course, and have now channeled that impulse and turned it into a prestigious and lucrative career blogging for Cracked.com, but sometimes I wonder, "What would my life be like if I had never learned to control myself?" Then I saw this video and I was like, "Oh, yeah - I'd be drinking liquid nitrogen and putting it up on YouTube."
To turn on reply notifications, click here

21 Comments

Load Comments

More Blogs

4 Surprisingly Insightful Plots From TV Sitcoms

These shows chose to go above and beyond.

76

5 Everyday Things With (Mostly Forgotten) Nazi Origins

Plenty of everyday things have weird connections to the Nazis.

108

6 Weirdly Terrible Books By Famous Authors

No author's bibliography is spotless.

136

5 Horrific Acts Committed By Lovable Sitcom Characters

Sometimes the silliest goofballs get away with the vilest things.

110

5 Shocking Movie/TV Character Betrayals (That Make No Sense)

The thing about plot twists is that they almost never make sense on repeat viewing.

110

5 Surprising Relationships Between Historical Figures

The coolest thing about being famous is that you get access to other famous people just as interesting as you.

36