Don't Be Like Jessica Simpson: A Lesson For Young Girls Everywhere
Lately, there’s been a lot of questions about Jessica Simpson’s weight gain. Questions like: Is she fat? How fat is she? How did she get so fat? And, wait, who's Jessica Simpson again? Well, you might remember her as the once svelte singer and actress whose songs you don't own and whose movies you haven’t seen. But more likely, you remember Jessica Simpson only as that naughty, barely legal piece of eye candy you could convince to have sex with you by promising a brand new unicorn and/or Travis Tritt tickets.
Well, times have changed and now everyone’s talking about the new Jessica:
WHATEVER YOU DO, DON’T BE LIKE JESSICA SIMPSON!
Do you want to be ridiculed? Do you want to be unloved? Do you want to be mocked on the cover of national magazines? Perhaps, even by theDON’T BE LIKE JESSICA SIMPSON!

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