Trump Is Plotting His Revenge on ‘South Park,’ Gossip Site Claims
As you may have heard, South Park hasn’t been very kind to our president this year.
Despite Trey Parker and Matt Stone’s previous statements about side-stepping contemporary presidential politics, Season 27 of South Park has depicted Donald Trump as a Saddam Hussein-esque dictator, who’s literally “fucking Satan,” and who has what may be the smallest penis ever seen on cable television.
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A White House lackey made headlines for calling the show “irrelevant” after the season premiere dropped, but Trump himself has yet to personally respond to the parody. This is a little surprising considering that the commander-in-chief rarely holds back when it comes to expressing his displeasure about comedians, be they late-night hosts, the cast of Saturday Night Live or Russell Brand — although, in retrospect, calling Brand a “loser” may be the only time in history that Trump was unequivocally correct.
Although Trump has been oddly quiet about South Park, one outlet is now reporting that he’s actually super-pissed and is currently plotting his revenge on Parker and Stone.
This is all coming from RadarOnline, the same website that regularly reports on Bigfoot sightings and undercover aliens, so take it with a Casa Bonita-sized grain of salt. But they’re claiming that Trump is currently working on a way to take South Park off the air, like Jimmy Kimmel Live! (but presumably for longer than five days).
According to an unnamed “source close to the production,” Trump “has been fuming about the way South Park portrayed him. He’s convinced the writers are obsessed with humiliating him and is now trying to use back-channel pressure to make sure the show doesn’t survive. People on the team think it’s no coincidence that Jimmy Kimmel Live! was abruptly canceled after years of mocking Trump — and they fear South Park could be next.”
Another anonymous “insider” told the website that the tiny dick, specifically, is really rubbing Trump the wrong way: “The president hates being made fun of, especially about his body. He sees the ‘tiny penis’ gag as crossing a line and is determined to punish the creators.”
“The delay of Episode Three has sent shockwaves through the writers’ room,” they noted. “Everyone is braced for the possibility the plug could be pulled altogether.”
A whole other source stated that “for Trump, it’s personal. He’s never forgiven late-night hosts for laughing at him, and he sees South Park as even more damaging because it appeals to younger viewers.”
“After Kimmel’s cancellation, insiders believe Trump feels emboldened,” the source who apparently doesn’t realize Kimmel wasn’t actually canceled added. “He wants to make an example out of the show and scare other networks into line.”
Again, it’s very possible that the article’s sources, in a Fight Club-esque twist, only exist inside the mind of the author. But it does seem pretty hard to believe that the TV-obsessed Trump isn’t aware of and enraged at the parody.
Either Trump has been secretly working on a scheme to take South Park off the air for good as the article suggests, or, more likely, he simply realizes that he’s outgunned.
