‘Badger My Ass, It’s Probably Milhouse,’ and Other Top-Tier, Post-Golden Age ‘Simpsons’ Quotes
Past Season 10, The Simpsons may not have had the comedic firepower of earlier episodes, but that didn’t stop the writers from dishing out lines that would stick around in the lexicons of die-hard fans for years to come, whether they had three kids and no money or no kids and three money.
Much like Mr. Burns, The Simpsons refuses to wither away (or get blown away) despite its advanced age. And, also like Mr. Burns, it’s still a money-printing machine to an obscene degree. While many members of the online Simpsons fandom are quite content keeping their viewing habits confined to the 20th century in “20th Century Fox,” they may be surprised to learn that many of the best quotes in Simpsons history came well after the show’s “Golden Age,” which can loosely be defined as the first decade of its 34-years-and-counting run at the top of adult-oriented animated comedy. Even the most loyal of Simpsons followers will admit that the general quality and consistency of the show’s writing began to decline as it entered a new millennium, but it’s foolish to pretend that the classic episodes abruptly stopped coming all at once, as if Mike Scully twisted the inspiration spigot shut the moment he became showrunner.
Over in the Simpsons subreddit, fans recently discussed which Simpsons quotes that came after the beginning of the show’s decline are still applicable in our daily lives, and the number of iconic utterances that came long after Maggie shot Mr. Burns is staggering — even if half of them just come from Season 12. Here are the top picks of the bunch, starting, of course with…
“Badger My Ass, It’s Probably Milhouse”
Everyone in Springfield seems to have the same dismissive attitude toward poor Milhouse Van Houten, but Homer’s the only one who’s been torn to shreds because of it. In the post-peak episode “A Tale of Two Springfields” from Season 12, the badger (or gryphon) both starts and ends the storyline about an area code change that tears the town in two, while that little wiener kid Milhouse sat this classic out.
“I Have Three Kids and No Money. Why Can’t I Have No Kids and Three Money?”
Fans of the Simpsons Golden Age may be surprised to learn that this preposterously oft-quoted line came from an episode all the way in Season 18: “Crook and Ladder,” an entry written by none other than Bob Odenkirk. Whether or not the Mr. Show with Bob and David and Breaking Bad/Better Call Saul wrote this specific line is unclear, but what’s beyond contention is the fact that, immediately after the episode’s airing, Homer’s lamentation became permanent slogan of comedy-loving fathers across the internet.
“Linguo… Dead?” “Linguo is Dead”
Lisa’s grammar-correcting robot would have felt right at home on Reddit if he had survived his run-in with the syntactically sinful mobsters of Fat Tony’s crew. Sadly for Linguo (and thankfully for Bart and Milhouse), in the Season 12 episode “Trilogy of Error,” the overload of incorrect grammar short-circuits Lisa’s science-fair project, and he accidentally ignites the stash of fireworks that sends Linguo to his linguistically pristine grave — but not before he said goodbye to Homer with one last correction.
“The Worst Day of Your Life, So Far”
The most memorable line of The Simpsons Movie bore repeating many times when the film premiered in 2007, and it’s worth many more iterations in the decade-and-change since. Despite the assumptions of many members of the critical community (as well as those of a few pessimistic fans) that a feature-length Simpsons film couldn’t possibly end up as anything other than a desperate cash-in from a dying franchise, The Simpsons Movie brought an equal number of life lessons and laughs into the bubble.
"We Could Remove the Crayon for You, It Could Vastly Increase Your Brain Power. Or It Could Possibly Kill You." “Increase My Killing Power, Eh?”
In certain circles of Simpsons stans, the Season 12 episode “HOMR” is a bit of a contentious topic. Some fans argue that the canon adjustment on Homer’s cranial capacity boorishly contradicts the established origins of his ignorance and the dulling power of the “Simpson gene,” while others claim that the connection Homer forged with Lisa once he could finally appreciate her intellect makes this one the most heartwarming episodes of the entire series — the Emmys sure thought so when they awarded this one the trophy for Outstanding Animated Program.
