Tragically, Peacock’s ‘The Continental’ Is A ‘John Wick’ Prequel, Not a Christopher Walken ‘SNL’ Movie
John Wick fans may be dismayed to learn that the upcoming miniseries The Continental does not list Keanu Reeves on the cast list. 1990s Saturday Night Live fans will definitely be disappointed to see that it doesn’t have Christopher Walken on it, either.
Though the Peacock original shares its name with both the creepy seduction TV show from the 1950s and the comedic SNL homage that brought the world the joy of hearing Christopher Walken butcher the word “champagne,” the project is, sadly, not an expansion on the life and love affairs of Walken’s best sketch character — no, it’s just some prequel BS. When I was told, “They’re giving The Continental an entire show,” I envisioned Walken wandering around his apartment building with a portable ice bucket getting his face slapped by even icier debutants — but Hollywood decided they’d rather make us watch a bunch of hitmen who aren’t John Wick hanging out in his favorite haunt. Wowie wow wow wow.
The Continental recently released a trailer ahead of its September release, leaving us with one single question: Does the hitman hotel have permanent residents, and, if so, has anyone checked their closets for periscopes?
Walken hasn’t played the lecherous, unsuccessful ladies man on SNL since 2003, but shortly before his final scene, he professed that he’d always hoped “The Continental” would be spun off into a feature film — though he understood why it might be unfeasible. “The problem with the Continental is that he never leaves his house,” Walken said in 2002. “But it might be interesting to see the Continental go out and nothing works. He’s a social catastrophe. I think that would be interesting.”
Obviously, there are plenty of obstacles preventing a new project centered around Walken’s Continental — the most notable one being that Lorne Michaels doesn’t make SNL movies anymore. However, as Michaels creeps toward retirement, perhaps a new regime will be more amenable to building a bridge between the show and the movie business after the box office return for MacGruber burned the last one.
For naysayers who would shoot down a Continental movie on the grounds that the voyeuristic, predatory European would be too “problematic” for modern audiences, just know this — the John Wick Continental series stars Mel “The Mouth” Gibson. You can’t get much more problematic than that.