Kevin Bacon Pays Weddings DJs Not to Play 'Footloose'

Prolific film and television star Kevin Bacon is set to make his MCU debut this Friday with an appearance as himself in The Guardians of the Galaxy Holiday Special, thus creating a crucial link between the entirety of the Marvel Universe and the rest of the entertainment galaxy in “Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon.”

The “center of the entertainment universe” has already been referenced in the Marvel Universe for his role in the iconic 1984 movie musical Footloose, of which Chris Pratt’s Peter Quill is a huge fan. However, the legendary hero Bacon is both haunted and blessed by the enduring enormity of a film that dared to ask the question, “What if dancing was illegal?”

Bacon revealed in a 2013 appearance on Conan that, each time the star attends a wedding, he has to pay the evening’s music director not to play that one Kenny Loggins song that Bacon just can’t stand anymore.

Bacon’s reasoning for restricting the song goes beyond the simple irritation that naturally occurs when one 80s earworm follows someone around for four decades – while the song is certainly a novelty for wedding guests who have no doubt been whispering about the movie star’s presence since he RSVP’d, it’s a major distraction from the festivities at hand, and it’s hardly celebratory for the bride to be upstaged at her own wedding.

The irony, however, is that by banning “Footloose” from the party, Bacon is, by extension, banning people from dancing to “Footloose,” therefore becoming the one thing he originally swore to destroy – John Lithgow.

There’s likely going to be plenty of dancing, plenty of Bacon, and plenty of “Footloose” when the actor makes his MCU debut on Friday. The Guardians of the Galaxy Holiday Special will show the Guardians returning to Earth in order to find Peter Quill the perfect Christmas present, which may end up being Bacon himself.

Cut loose, Kevin.