A week after the New York attorney general released the conclusion of a damning investigation claiming that New York Governor Andrew Cuomo allegedly groped, harassed, and kissed at least 11 women, creating a work environment that was “rife with fear and intimidation" the day we've waited for has finally arrived – the lawmaker has finally gotten over himself enough to resign from his post. 

“The best way I can help now is if I step aside and let government get back to governing,” Cuomo said during a televised conference on Tuesday, in which he also denied several of the claims detailed in the report. 

“The report said I sexually harassed 11 women. That was the headline people heard, and saw, and reacted to. The reaction was outrage, it should have been. However, it was also false. My lawyers… have reviewed the report over the last several days, and have already raised serious issues and flaws that should concern all New Yorkers," he continued,  singlehandedly prompting masses of neo-liberal Manhattan housewives to check the return policies on the “Cuomosexual” t-shirts they copped amid the height of his a little too-beloved daily Covid-19 briefings. 

Despite being dunked on by approximately everyone, with some speculating what vomit-inducing pun the New York Post will use to detail the rare occasion of the trash taking itself out the cover of their Wednesday morning paper ….

… gleefully noting that 75-year-old actress Liza Minelli has outlived Cuomo's reign … 

… while the The Daily Show mused that we've taken Cuomo's early Covid-19 battle cry of “flatten the curve” to the next level … 

… it seems by some weird stroke of luck, the soon-to-be-former New York Governer has somehow managed to maintain one ally amid his self-inflicted disaster – notorious douchecanoe, Alec Baldwin. Amid the news of Cuomo's resignation, the Boss Baby himself took to Twitter to speak on the matter, broaching every boomer's favorite talking point amid allegations of misconduct -- good 'ol cancel culture. 

“Regardless of what you think of Cuomo, this is a tragic day,” the actor wrote. “Party politics in this country draw ambitious but ultimately isolated, even socially maladjusted men and women who, given the current cancel culture, will likely have their shortcomings exposed and magnified.” Yes, because allegedly harassing women on a habitual basis is definitely a trait appropriately described as a “shortcoming." 

Although the two have worked together professionally, with the actor working with Cuomo's office to create videos urging New York residents to stay home at the beginning of the pandemic in spring 2020,  the actor has spoken out about the perceived threat of cancel culture respective of his pal, per The Hill, describing the phenomenon as “creating more problems than it solves” during an Instagram Live last March.

“It's like trolling,” the actor explained. "It's like a giant, mile-long net and you're catching a lot of people, more than a few who deserve it, and more than a few who don't. Or they don't deserve to have their careers and their lives destroyed."

So, folks, take it from Cuomo – don't be creepy.

Top Image: Shutterstock/Shutterstock

For more internet nonsense, follow Carly on Instagram @HuntressThompson_ on TikTok as @HuntressThompson_, and on Twitter @TennesAnyone.

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