Breaking: 'Clifford the Big Red Dog' is a Big Red Dog, Terrifies The Internet
Ahh, Clifford The Big Red Dog. An adorably animated pup, beloved by owner and best friend, Emily Elizabeth, buddies T-Bone and Cleo, and millions of adoring children around the globe. Famed for his massive stature kind and helpful nature, good ol' Clifford is now going viral as the latest terrifying proof just because a beloved childhood character can be CGI-ed in a live-action reboot doesn't mean they should be CGI-ed in a live-action reboot. Come on people, did we not learn anything from last year's Sonic The Hedgehog fiasco?
Earlier today, Paramount Pictures released a first look trailer at 2021's Clifford the Big Red Dog introducing the word to the classic character's new design. "This holiday season, we're thankful for the pets whose love got us through the year," the narrator reads as the camera pans down a line of certifiably good boys. "But next year, get ready to love, even bigger," Suddenly, the shot zooms out, revealing a gargantuan Clifford towering over the lot, who then proceeds to lick the screen.
Only 19 seconds long, the teaser has sparked mixed reactions from fans, many of whom are terrified by the implications of the famed dog's more, erm, realistic form.
"there is a reason why clifford the big red dog is only palatable in animated form bc the second you acknowledge that he's just a giant fucking dog he instantly becomes terrifying," quipped user @annettebirkn.
"clifford is already drenched in the blood of his enemies and he isn't finished," wrote @Kathriller of the dog's new design.
"Listen, if I've learned anything from Sonic the Hedgehog, it's that we can all cyber bully a Hollywood studio enough to get a better looking Clifford the Big Red Dog than this," suggested @MattHerms.
"a live-action clifford the big red dog is supposed to work?" asked @sarah_micheleg "without being terrifying?"
However not everyone understood what the fuss was all about, pointing out that Clifford's big, red appearance may be due to the fact that he is, well, Clifford the Big Red Dog.
"people getting genuinely upset because clifford the big red dog is a literal big red dog in the new movie is really funny to me," mused @SuperstuHD.
"mfs when clifford the big red dog looks like a big red dog," wrote user @watcherhotdog alongside a video of a woman freaking out.
Sure, Clifford's new design may be true to his name, but think about it -- the fictitious pup's size is more than just a little intimidating. One wrong step, and you're toast. As Jeff Goldblum once put it, "Your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn't stop to think if they should," a rookie mistake in the world of CGI filmmaking.