Neat, right? There's just one problem. The effects only last seven seconds ... which is several less than the Hulk-jump itself. Meaning that by the time you land, your super-powered legs will have reverted back to scrawny normal legs, and this will happen:
"Oh, the wizard read the thing and then ... ohhhhh-" *splat*
If you're not one of those obsessive maniacs who saves their game every 15 minutes, you have to start from the beginning. But of course, you are that obsessive maniac -- you've got backup saves, for Christ's sake -- so it's more like the developers just spit in your eye, instead of spitting in your eye and stealing your wallet.
The Lost World: Jurassic Park Insults You For Finding All The Collectibles
In the 1997 PlayStation/Sega Saturn video game, The Lost World: Jurassic Park, Jeff Goldblum re-reprises his role as Dr. Ian Malcolm ... solely to call you a loser.
As all video games are legally required to do, The Lost World has a crapload of collectible items you must find to truly "complete" it. In this case, it is a bunch of "DNA keys" that you get by deviating from the main path, looking under rocks, or making ridiculously hard jumps. But it's aaaall worth it, because if you get all the keys, Goldblum himself appears in a secret video ending!
"If an all-female colony of dinosaurs can reproduce, there's still hope for you, buddy."
Malcolm begins by heartily celebrating your achievement ... before gradually becoming more despondent, telling you to turn off your console and go do something more productive with your life. The message ends with Malcolm abruptly rushing off as monstrous sounds and vibrations approach -- which is either a T. rex, or an army of betrayed nerds out for vengeance.
Tiagosvn is eager to read about your video game achievements on his twitter so that he too gets to laugh at them.
For more ridiculous gaming shenanigans, read The 5 Most Unreasonably Difficult Video Game Puzzles Ever and The 6 Most Absurdly Difficult Video Game Puzzles.
And be sure to check out 9 Types Of Coworkers To Make You Want Your Head To Explode, and let us know about other headsplosion-worthy employees we may have missed.
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