To be fair, it's kind of a dumbass move to pack Nineteen Eighty-Four while visiting a dictatorship.
... and the obligatory "creative liberties" Hollywood would have taken to make the story more like a spy thriller. Either way, expect a lot of Carell screaming in panic.
Unfortunately, thanks to Rogen shoving his dick jokes into the nuclear hornet's nest, the movie was dead before it could really take off. New Regency didn't think they could risk a controversial movie of their own, while Verbinski welcomed the possibility of World War III, stating, "I find it ironic that fear is eliminating the possibility to tell stories that depict our ability to overcome fear." To which the studio probably responded: "Yeah, but nukes and shit. Right?"
The Catcher In The Rye Will Never Get A Movie Because Of A Terrible Version Of Another J.D. Salinger Story
J.D. Salinger's Catcher In The Rye has long been considered by hipsters (and assassins) to be the greatest book against phonies ever written. Holden Caulfield's story of self-discovery mirrors that of many a pissed-off, surly, uniquely rebellious teenager -- so, all of them, basically. That probably explains why entire generations of actors, from Marlon Brando to Leonardo DiCaprio, have tried to get the movie done with themselves in the lead.
Modern-day Holden would be a lot tougher on immigration, based on the color of his cap.
The problem is that, like his boy Caulfield, Salinger was on a bit of a crusade against the phonies of the world -- and to him, no one was phonier than Hollywood (not sure how he got that impression).
Salinger didn't always feel that way. Early in his career, he sold the rights to his short story Uncle Wiggily In Connecticut, a commentary on materialism in the post-WWII era. According to his assistant, Salinger "thought they would make a good movie," which wasn't an unreasonable assumption considering that the script would be written by the screenwriters of Casablanca, Julius and Philip Epstein.
So what did the Epsteins do? They changed the name to My Foolish Heart, ditched all the social commentary, and turned the story into a sappy romantic tale.
They also added a plot about erotic asphyxiation, hence the choking in this picture.
Even though the film was a commercial hit, Salinger hated it so much that he refused to allow any more adaptations of his work. Including Catcher In The Rye. Of course, there might be another reason why he turned down all those offers from famous actors: According to his one-time girlfriend, Salinger thought only he himself could play Caulfield. It's probably a little bit of column A, a little bit of column B.
Anyway, if you excitedly thought that Salinger's death might finally bring about a Catcher adaptation, then you're 1) a shitty person, and 2) wrong. The people who manage his trust were fully aware of his aversion to licensing out any of his works, and will continue his crusade for generations to come. On the upside, think of all the murders from illiterate would-be killers we're avoiding this way.
Jordan Breeding is a part-time writer, a full-time lover, and an all the time guitarist. Check out his band at Skywardband.com or on Spotify here.
Behind every awful movie is the idea for a good one. Old man Indiana Jones discovers aliens: Good in theory, bad in practice. Batman fights Superman: So simple, but so bad. Are there good versions of these movies hidden within the stinking turds that saw the light of day? Jack O'Brien hosts Soren Bowie, Daniel O'Brien, and Katie Willert of After Hours on our next live podcast to find an answer, as they discuss their ideal versions of flops, reboots, and remakes. Tickets are $7 and can be purchased here!
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