"Taking up our time with Satanists when there are Muslims we could be profiling?!"
Eventually, it dawned on them that either horror movies are real and Garner was starring in one, or somebody was pulling a con. In either situation, there was only one thing for the police to do: harass the protagonist. They began a shadow investigation called "Mars," this time directed at Garner himself. Of course, you already know that he invented the entire thing, because he's in this article. What you don't know is why: He just really, really didn't want to be married to his wife anymore. The back wounds? Self-inflicted, courtesy of a scalpel tied on a stick.
Martin Hunter via New Zealand Herald
Couldn't even be bothered to put an ad up on Craigslist.
See, Garner had been having an affair with a receptionist at work, and was looking for a way out of his marriage. Being the proactive type, he decided to tie this up with a big fat fraudulent insurance payment. We're not sure at what point the logic leapt from "Leave the wife, fraud a little, hope not to get caught" to "Make up a generic horror movie villain and pretend they burned down your house, while carving pentagrams on your own back with a scalpel tied to a stick," but that's us. We're not creative thinkers.