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Hayabusa vs. Mr. Gannosuke in an Anus Explosion Death Match
Frontier Martial-Arts Wrestling
In 1999, Japanese company Frontier Martial-Arts Wrestling held the first-ever Anus Explosion Death Match, where a lit firework up the ass was not only 100 percent legal, it was how to win the match. While these wrestlers certainly could have pinned their opponent or made them submit, when you have the option to stick a small explosive into your opponent's ass crack, light it up, and let it fly, why wouldn't you take it?
The Asses of Fire match was the latest chapter in a heated rivalry where the masked Hayabusa (actually an impostor named Mr. Gannosuke) fought the unmasked H (who was the original Hayabusa back when HE wore the mask Mr. Gannosuke was currently wearing). Confused? Just focus on the buttcracker and you'll be fine. It takes some time to get there though -- surprisingly, neither man is willing to just let the other set his asshole on fire. They spend the first eight minutes engaging in a standard wrestling brawl that spills out into the crowd and all throughout the building. Then, Hayabusa breaks out a pair of handcuffs.
Frontier Martial-Arts Wrestling
"Now bring out the Gimp."
He beats down H some more, throws him into the ring, and teases a boring-ass pinfall victory. But before the count is over, he pulls H up, handcuffs him to one of the corners, and strips him down to his thong. Thousands of fans stand in their seats, all thinking one thought: I paid money to see this happen. This is my life now.
Frontier Martial-Arts Wrestling
"If anyone asks what I did tonight, I'll tell them I was snorting crack in an alley. It's less embarrassing."
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