But, precisely because Mokhles was busy being distracted/grossed out by the sight of the baby leaving his wife's vagina and dangling upside down, he didn't notice the crash barrier he had just swerved into. The car bounced and rolled over four times, crossing two lanes of highway, until it landed in a ditch. Besides Mokhles and his wife, their previous two offspring were sitting in the back seat of the car. Mokhles says that after the crash he thought the entire family might be dead, because of course he fucking did.
Finding his wife unconscious and his two other children rattled but unhurt, Mokhles panicked when he realized his seconds-old daughter "had disappeared from sight." However, as with every time you lose something important in your car, he found what he was looking for in the most classic hiding place: underneath the passenger seat. The little indestructibaby was completely fine.
Except for some mild exposure to an expired taco and a long-lost Mama Mia CD.
The mother had a few injuries, but the rest of the family was OK. The car itself was written off, but luckily for the parents they'd borrowed it from a friend. Presumably they'd ramped their own car into the ocean during conception or something.
Baby Gets an Entire Burning House Dumped on Her, Turns Up Fine
Mississippi resident Michael Elliott was walking into the kitchen with his 10-month-old cousin, Oleandra, in his arms when an explosion knocked him down, along with the kitchen and the whole damn house. A gas leak had turned the entire two-story construction into a flaming pile of junk with a family trapped underneath (except the grandpa, who was -- no kidding -- ejected all the way to the neighbor's yard).
Firefighters got all of the adults out fairly quickly, but there was one little problem: No one knew where baby Oleandra had ended up. The explosion knocked her right out of Elliott's arms, and he lost track of her after that, what with the whole "having severe burns on his body" thing. All they knew was that the baby was somewhere in the house, which at this point looked like this:
Not pictured: much reason for hope.
To make matters worse, the only way the firefighters could remove the wreckage was by first dousing it with gallons of water -- for those of you with limited medical knowledge, "gallons" is definitely enough water to drown a baby.
At 5 a.m., after the fire department and half the neighborhood had been looking for 10 hours, they had to stop because it was raining too heavily (we should reiterate the fact that babies can drown very easily and that Oleandra's family aren't a race of amphibians). The search started again around 9:30 a.m., but obviously everyone's spirits had seen better times. It was about an hour later that they noticed something unusual: The house's basement had only half-collapsed. And in the non-collapsed part, there sat a non-charred, non-drowned baby.
The celebratory wave from the guy at the back didn't catch on.
It turns out that, in the best real-life demonstration of cartoon physics ever, the explosion made Oleandra fall through the floor before everything collapsed on top of her, in just such a way that it left a little gap that was both fire- and waterproof. The local residents promptly got together and raised thousands of dollars to cover Oleandra's medical bills, but we're not sure if that's because they're all kind and generous individuals or if they just think it's wise to make a good impression on the baby who's clearly got some sort of supernatural entity on her side.
Or, most likely, all of them.
Related Reading: Some stories of survival just seem too badass to be true, like this fighter pilot who flew his plane to safety while standing on the wing. And then of course there's the woman who survived a fall off the damn Empire State Building. And if all these stories weren't quite badass enough for you (somehow) you should check out the coolest survival traits ever designed by evolution.
And for more ways we underestimate children, check out 14 Things Kids Suspect About the Adult World.