It doesn't seem like the sort of job where you'd want to steal from the till, but damn it, NASA has some awesome stuff that's just begging to be stolen ...
The Crime:
While he'd finally made it to the big show, Roberts' dreams of space travel took a backseat when he noticed a selection of moon rocks -- and one from Mars -- that a NASA scientist kept in a locked safe in his office. He decided: Fuck going to the moon, he had the moon right here.
Kolossos
Plus, do you know how expensive a Saturn V is? Like ... a couple grand, at least.
Over the course of months, Roberts hatched his plan to steal part of the moon. Eventually, he met and fell in love with an intern, Tiffany Fowler, who agreed to help him commit the celestial heist. So what sort of sophisticated Ocean's 11-style caper did they embark upon to snatch the precious space rocks? Did they need to steal security codes? Hack the surveillance cameras? Somersault in between security lasers?
Ha ha, no! They just loaded the 600-pound safe onto a dolly and walked right out the goddamn door, presumably whistling nonchalantly the whole time.
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