Yep, Woody Woodpecker might seem like a relic from the heyday of American cartoons to you, but he was apparently huge in '90s Japan. So after securing the rights to use Mr. Woodpecker and conducting an amount of research so infinitesimal that scientists are still studying it today, Panasonic proudly dubbed their new computer "The Woody." But wait, it gets better -- to truly set their touch screen capability apart from the competition, Panasonic named the feature "Touch Woody." But wait again, it gets even better -- Panasonic was all geared up to launch the PC with an ad campaign featuring the catchy slogan "Touch Woody -- the Internet Pecker."
Panasonic had no clue that anything was wrong with the slogan until the day before the ads were set to launch, when an American staff member informed them of the sexual slang connotations, presumably while spraying them with soda out of his nose.
Photodisc/Photodisc/Getty Images"No, go with it. Just let me cash out my stock options first."
"Stunned and embarrassed," Japanese Panasonic executives immediately postponed the product launch in order to retool their marketing efforts, and after careful consideration (which we have to assume involved suggestions for alternate slogans such as "Rub Harry, the Internet Ballsack" and "Grope Booby, the Internet Titty"), they decided it was too late to rename the system and instead simply adjusted the name of the touch screen feature from "Touch Woody" to the much more respectable "Woody Touch Screen" ... which still touted an "Internet Pecker" online support function (which we believe was later renamed "Chatroulette").
And that, dear Cracked readers, is how years of research and technological innovation can be completely negated by the power of one accidental boner reference.
blog.goo.ne.jpSomewhere in Japan, a board room of executives is still baffled.
Evan V. Symon is a moderator in the Cracked Workshop. He can be found on Facebook, or you can vote for his new book, The End of the Line.
For more baffling corporate decisions, check out The 7 Most Idiotic Corporate Temper Tantrums. Or learn about Dickonomics: How 5 Everyday Businesses Trick You.
If you're pressed for time and just looking for a quick fix, then check out 6 Reasons Not to Freak Out About the 3D Printer Gun.
And stop by LinkSTORM to see why Walt Disney's rampant porn addiction almost ruined him.
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