While the parades at Disney World, just a few streets over, consist of fireworks, floats and the promise of some candy thrown into the crowd, this one consists of one limping man tied to a plank of wood and the promise of some blood splattering into the crowd. The culmination of the whole thing, of course, is the mascot being hung from a cross and slowly dying.
It would probably be quicker to make a list of the people who wouldn't be offended by this reenactment. The park's kindest critics have called it "kitschy." The other critics who aren't too stunned to speak have called it a tasteless money grab through blatant exploitation of faith, probably. Surely at least someone has said that.
But hey, after watching Christ die, you can head to the Centurion Treats snack bar for an ice cream sandwich or to the "Celebrate Jesus - Karaoke" show to really take your mind off the public torture and murder you just witnessed. Oh, and did we mention there's a climbing wall?