That brings us to Dr. Allan Zarkin, who was so pleased with the Caesarean section he performed that he decided to tag it with his initials. We don't mean he pulled out a Sharpie, either -- Zarkin (appropriately nicknamed "Dr. Zorro" by the press) carved the initials "AZ" into Liana Gedz's stomach, presumably forgetting that human beings are not pumpkins, public playground equipment or school desks.
Apparently, Zarkin had a reputation among hospital staff for being "larger than life" and "a little nutty," citing his fashionable dress and joking nature. Gedz, however, had to go and remind everybody that the real world does not tolerate wacky surgeons as easily as in the Scrubs universe and sued Zarkin and the hospital for $5.5 million in damages.
"It's basically a free tattoo! What's her problem?"
Remarkably, Zarkin's defense was that he has a degenerative brain condition called Pick's disease. Well, that's OK then. Because nothing says "acquit" like "I shouldn't be performing surgery in the first place because my brain is dying."
Naturally, Zarkin was dismissed from Beth Israel Hospital, which had been fined $14,000 by the state, in addition to the massive lawsuit from the patient. So you'd think he'd vanish quietly into retirement, right? Actually, a few months after the incident, he got another job at Choices Women's Medical Center performing, you guessed it, women's health services. Good thing he got that brain thing fixed!
"Next time, I'll sign her on the inside."