The doorbell rings and there you stand, all ready for your big date. Maybe you brought flowers. Maybe you even tucked your shirt in, not only to impress your girlfriend, but also to make a good impression on her parents. But guess what? Basic shirt-tucking skills are only going to take you so far with this guy, because as far as he's concerned, you are a vision of failure, through and through.
Not your failures, but his.
Which is not to say that you aren't riddled with failure.
Why You Can't Win
Now, we're not saying that he's jealous because you're so incredibly awesome and dude, he's so incredibly lame. We're saying that no matter what age you are, everyone feels threatened by younger members of the same sex. This is why we have these creepy stereotypes of "daddy's little girl" and "mama's boy" -- parents tend to favor their opposite-sexed children. It's partly because we condition boys to be our competitors, and partly because we're all petty animals at heart. You showing up on your girlfriend's dad's doorstep is like slapping the old man in the face with his own flaccid manhood.
Keep in mind, every middle-aged guy has some regret. You will too once you reach his age and realize that you will in fact never have your own rap label. So when you show up to pick up this guy's daughter, it's not just that he sees the douche who's going to be boning his little girl later (which he does, but more on that in a minute). He also sees himself at your age, and all the wasted years in between.
Then again, maybe your girlfriend's dad is a billionaire skydiving globetrotter who's accomplished everything he ever dreamed of doing. Maybe you're dating Virgin Branson Jr. Surely a guy like that won't feel threatened by some punk-ass kid such as yourself? Think again.
You could be as menacing as a McLovin/Urkel love child, sadistically named McLurkel. You could literally be a girl. It doesn't matter. When it comes to dating a man's daughter, you are first and foremost a threat. And what you're threatening is his status as the alpha male, so you better take this shit seriously.