How to Organize Your Vast Collection of Pens
Oh, hell yes. If you've had a huge line of male sexual partners, this one will help you organize all those...
Oh, wait. It says "Pens."
Most Important Step:
Step one starts with the words "If you don't have a collection..." Which are most likely intended for the readers who've yet to own a sloppy stack of pens, and merely wish to prepare themselves for the day that embarrassment rears its ugly head.
Step two instructs you to "look for pens in that messy room of yours." That's right, after sitting in your bushes, WikiHow is now in your closet, and knows about the pens "lying around under your bed" and "inside those filthy shoes."
The rest is pretty straightforward, with instructions to acquire some pen cases, and some organization info regarding the different types of pens (i.e. ballpoint pens, gel pens, 0.7, glitter pens, vibrating dick pens, "I Hate WikiHow" pens, etc.).
Finally, you can display your collection! Flaunt your pens! Watch your peers be utterly crushed by jealousy!
Most Important Tip:
It reminds us that "it's okay if the pen doesn't have ink," because "the first thing a person sees is the outside of the pen, not the ink." Sounds like that was written by a dude who was shooting blanks.
Most Important Warning:
WikiHow cautions readers on the risks involved with doing all of this on your bed, for the "ink caps" may come off and "stain the bed sheet."
Yeah... this is definitely not an article about pens.
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