You see, Shmira, a 100-person vigilante group based in NYC, is comprised entirely of Jews. As of press time, neither the Hebrew Hammer nor the Zohan could be reached for comment, leading the Cracked research team to believe that both are stupid exploitative fictional caricatures and not real people.
So what could possibly go wrong when a group composed entirely of members of a single religion or ethnicity decide to take vengeance on bad guys? Meet Andrew Charles, a young black man who took an unwarranted beating at the hands of the Shmira. That caused people to start to murmur all sorts of crazy things about "racism" and "gang violence" and "Adam Sandler used to be a lot funnier."
You could say that the Shmira didn't quite help the cause of Jewish folks in that particular neighborhood. Add in the fact that Charles was the son of an NYPD sergeant, and that after the beating the Shmira were presumably the only people who would protect those Jews, and you could say they achieved the exact opposite of what they set out to accomplish. Unless their secret goal was to teach everyone an important lesson about the value of the whole "due process" thing.
The San Juna Ixtayopan Lynch Mob
To us English-speakers here at Cracked, loco means "crazy". It's something corny white guys say while they're putting on a bad Mexican accent and ordering "gwackamowlee."
Whatever it means to us, "loco" has its subtle cultural nuances. For instance, in the Mexican community of San Juan Ixtayopan, it means "flip over a Ford Focus, drag out the suspected child-stalkers inside, and burn them alive." Which, not coincidentally, is exactly what a group of vigilantes did.
The only real problem, as we see it, is that the perverts they burnt to a crisp were in fact Mexican Federal Agents. Whoops.
Mexico is not the most pleasant place to live, apparently. The residents of San Juan Unpronounceable grew weary of the violence and baby raping and decided to take matters into their own hands. It's just that, even if the men were actually evil perverts, dousing them with gasoline and setting them on fire is not precisely "justice" in any language.
Sombra Negra means "black shadow" in Spanish, proving that even the coolest vigilante names in the world can still be painfully redundant (nobody wants to be confused with the magenta shadows, after all). So what did these guys do to earn the top spot on our list? Oh, just target one of the most powerful criminal enterprises in the fucking world.
The mob, you might suggest? No, not the Italians. Once you've been around long enough to be on the Simpsons, you're really not that dangerous anymore. No, kids, the particular enterprise Sombra Negra targets is none other than El Salvador's own Mara Salvatrucha, otherwise known as MS13.
MS13, for those Cracked readers not in the know, are fucking scary criminals. They've taken over border towns all along the Rio Grande, and have overrun Laredo, TX so thoroughly that not even Texas' own Rangers will go there. In other words El Salvador's Black Shadow is the only group in the world with big enough balls to take them on.
Unlike the rest of the vigilantes on this list, not much is known about Sombra Negra other than they're a group of police and military personnel who like to execute their blindfolded targets with pistols. In 1995 it was claimed the group had executed 17 people.
Why hasn't the score been updated in the 13 years since? It's because in some ways we know even less about Sombra Negra than we do about MS13 itself, which is really saying something. If you're more underground than the underground criminal enterprise you're stalking, you sir are one bad motherfucker. Black Shadow, we formally apologize for making fun of your name.
Learn to do your part in fighting evil with our practical guide How to Punch Oasis in the Face. Or, for people who had the powers, if not the insanity and desire, check out 7 People From Around the World With Real Mutant Superpowers. Or for people whose parents at least had the right idea, check out The 9 Manliest Names in the World.