14 Romantic Celebrities Who Have Some Insightful and Insane Things to Say About Love
From toilet etiquette to abandoning your entire system of values and morals because a celebrity wants to date you, celebrities have lots of advice for aspiring lovebirds.
Catherine Zeta-Jones
It’s not as pithy as “happy wife, happy life,” but it works just as well: “For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have their own bathroom. The end.”
Portia de Rossi
The fact that she’s saying this about Ellen, of all people, makes one wonder what kind of music she’s listening to: “Ellen took my breath away. That had never happened to me in my life, where I saw somebody and experienced all of those things you hear about in songs and read about in poetry. My knees were weak.”
Taylor Swift
The woman whose fame is rooted in dating a string of awful celebrities says the point of having values is to ignore them immediately upon finding someone very hot: “Here’s what I’ve learned about deal-breakers: If you have enough natural chemistry with someone, you overlook every single thing that you said would break the deal.”
Ruth Bader Ginsburg
Perhaps referring to a medical condition she should have paid more attention to, she said, “In every good marriage, it pays sometimes to be a little deaf.”
Justin Timberlake
He says being endlessly wealthy and spineless is the best way to navigate a relationship: “We have a couple of rules in our relationship. The first rule is that I make her feel like she’s getting everything. The second rule is that I actually do let her have her way in everything. And, so far, it’s working.”
Amy Schumer
Disney has ruined the brains of several generations, but a pinch of critical thinking goes a long way: “I’m very hopeful and was raised on all the fairy tales everyone else had. I just noted that everyone’s mom was dead and real princesses get beheaded, so I just have a more realistic take on it.”
Carrie Underwood
She says it’s important to lose your own personhood and take on the mental load for your deadbeat husband early and often: “I spent 27 years not being married, and I kinda got used to it. For the first year of our marriage, I still would give people gifts and write, ‘Love, Carrie,’ and I’m like, okay, now I’m ‘Carrie and Mike.’”
Gwyneth Paltrow
Faux-British accent aside, Queen Goop has a solid anecdote about marriage longevity: “I asked my dad once, ‘How did you and mum stay married for 33 years?’ And he said, ‘Well, we never wanted to get divorced at the same time.’”
Kim Kardashian
It’s an uncharacteristically sage mantra for a Kardashian, but it also explains why she’d get mixed up with a series of the dumbest men on the planet: “I think you have different soulmates throughout your life, that your soul needs different things at different times.”
Chrissy Teigen
It sounds like John Legend pulled out the wrong party trick at the wrong moment: “I think a good rule of thumb is to never play ‘fuck/marry/kill’ between other couples you are currently sitting with.”
Hugh Jackman
He’s either a very sweet, dedicated husband, or they’re doing the celebrity equivalent of a shared Facebook profile: “Even at the Oscars, I walk out, I put my hand on my heart and I always look to Deb in the audience. Straight afterwards, I will not see anybody in my dressing room until Deb’s been in. Because that is my foundation, that is the rock, that is the foundation of our family, and therefore my life.”
Tina Fey
She clearly hated dating: “I think someone should design exercise machines that reward people with sex at the end of their workouts because people will perform superhuman feats for even the faint hope of that.”
Cate Blanchett
She says it’s cool if your partner voted to burn your rights to the ground, just as long as your anatomy kind of matches up: “If your bodies actually fit together when you’re sleeping in bed — I’m not going to get into too much detail — you’re in good stead. When you can spoon with someone, then you’re okay. Because you might not vote the same way, you might not have the same politics, but sometimes that works for people.”
Rodney Dangerfield
The zinger king says absence makes the heart grow fonder: “My wife and I were happy for 20 years. Then we met.”