Movie posters are tricky -- sometimes they're really cool pieces of art, and other times they're just a bunch of giant heads with some words on them. Sometimes it's even possible to predict exactly how a poster's going to look based on who's starring in the movie, because, as we've mentioned before, some actors tend to do the same, eerily specific thing for every piece of promotional material they appear in, whether it be because of some irrational fear, bizarre superstition, very specific form of vanity, or other reason only they know. For instance ...
8Ryan Gosling Keeps Hiding His Left Cheek
Columbia Pictures, FilmDistrict, Fireworks Pictures, The Weinstein Company
Everyone has something they are self-conscious about, and for Ryan Gosling that thing seems to be his left cheek. For a man who famously possesses the ability to overclock human ovaries, it's a bit weird that he'd be so ashamed of showing us parts of his face.
Fireworks Pictures, Paramount Classics
Turns out Gosling's secretly far right.
What does he have under there? Acne? A weird birthmark? A map tattoo leading to buried pirate treasure? Whatever horrible secret is burned into his profile, Gosling is determined to hide it by any means necessary, from strategic vanity poses ...
Someone tried to pass him on the left once. Once.
... to more elaborate maneuvers, like covering half of his face with George Clooney.
The poster was quickly recalled after every woman that saw it instantly became pregnant.
On posters for Blue Valentine and The Notebook, he seized Michelle Williams and Rachel McAdams and strategically attempted to swallow their faces, merely to create a plausible excuse for keeping his left cheek shrouded in mystery.
The Weinstein Company, New Line Cinema
"Yes, that was the only reason."
Based on this overwhelming evidence, we are left to conclude that Ryan Gosling, in a last-minute act of panicked desperation, caved in the left side of his face on the poster for Only God Forgives:
He is now seated by the right face of the Father. Amen.
7Meryl Streep Needs Something Touching Her Chin
The Weinstein Company, 20th Century Fox, Paramount Pictures
Meryl Streep is widely considered to be one of the greatest actresses in history, which is a crown that apparently sits so heavily that she has difficulty keeping her head up. Consequently, in many of her posters, Streep needs to keep her skull supported or risk toppling over like an elegant beanstalk.
20th Century Fox, Paramount Pictures, Columbia Pictures, Warner Bros.
Coming next summer, Big Skull, Big Heart: One Woman's Struggle With Bobblehead Syndrome.
This oddly specific trend can be traced as far back as 1979's The Seduction Of Joe Tynan, in which a weary Meryl rests her face on a phone while fending off Alan Alda's advances.
Alda is like a tornado -- you just have to ride it out and eventually he goes away.
As the years went by, Meryl Streep's condition seems to have improved, although she still occasionally keeps a ready hand at her chin, as if she expects her melon to swing pendulously down at any moment.
Columbia Pictures, 20th Century Fox, The Weinstein Company
Either that, or she's been dealing with one bitch of a toothache for the last few decades.