6 Myths About Famous Places You Believe (Thanks to Movies)
Even if you've never left your hometown, you have a mental picture of virtually every famous city in the world. That's what movies are for, right? You'll never go to Moscow, but you know what you'll find there -- huge buildings with onion-shaped roofs and lots of snow.
Well, we're sorry to say that Hollywood really doesn't seem to do all that much homework on some of these locations. That's why you may come away thinking ...
#6.
Washington, D.C., Has Skyscrapers
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America's capital turns up in everything from political thrillers to alien invasion movies, yet very few movies are actually shot there. Usually they'll nab a few shots of the U.S. Capitol and then head to New York City (or if they're on a budget, Toronto) and fill in the blanks. Why not? Every city pretty much looks the same, right?
This is why movies get so many little things wrong about D.C. -- people who actually live there can chuckle when The Invasion showcases the capital's many nonexistent newspaper stands, or when Live Free or Die Hard sticks in tollbooths, which the city actually has none of. But, like we said, those are little things. When you're trying to pass off another city as Washington, D.C., it's better to focus on the bigger giveaways, like maybe the freaking skyline.
That's a shot of D.C. in the newest Die Hard film. See that big building there? How tall do you think that is? We're guessing about 30 floors. And next to it is a building with about 15 floors.
Here's the thing: There are no skyscrapers in D.C.
The highest commercial building in D.C. is One Franklin Square, which reaches a whopping ... 12 stories.
In fact, the highest anything in D.C. is the Washington Monument, followed by the Basilica of the National Shrine of the Immaculate Conception, which is only 329 feet tall.
The ratio of skyscrapers to dinosaurs is exactly the same.
And yet in Live Free or Die Hard ...
This picture is riddled with inaccuracies.
And it's not like Die Hard is the only one. Check out the view from Nicole Kidman's office in The Invasion.
Or go ahead and try to watch Enemy of the State, where they pretty much just take D.C. and mash it together with Baltimore:
Shoot him before he produces that Karate Kid remake!
Oh, and remember that scene in True Lies where the terrorist jumps from one building to the next after a chase around Georgetown?
There is nothing remotely resembling this building anywhere in D.C. Possibly sensing that someone from D.C. might actually see the movie at some point, James Cameron brilliantly added a blurry superimposed backdrop of the nation's capital in front of the Los Angeles Westin Bonaventure Hotel:
Yes, this is from the same man who has several Academy Award nominations for visual effects.
#5.
The Louvre Is a Dignified Resting Place for Masterpieces
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If you've never been to the Louvre in Paris, you can still easily picture it in your head: vast, silent, looking the same as it would if you were visiting in the 13th century. Nothing but ancient art ...
... and ornate columns with marble floors.
Those shots are from The Da Vinci Code, and you see that the only modern bit of architecture is the glass pyramid outside:
But if you show up there, you're going to actually see this:
Via The crowds certainly don't take away from the structure itself. It's no wonder that when The Da Vinci Code was filmed there, the headlines didn't read that the movie was being shot in the Louvre -- they all read that the Louvre was allowing a movie to be shot there. It's a pretty big deal, and why wouldn't it be? The ornate, dignified building has so much history that when they proposed at the end of the film that the Holy Grail was hidden beneath the main entrance area, it actually seemed possible.
Via Incase.
See, it makes sense, doesn't it? A resting place so majestic and dignified that ... wait, what the hell is that? It almost looks like the Apple logo there ...
Via Jonathan Smiley
What the fuck? Yes, that's an Apple store. At the entrance to the Louvre. Why? Because the entrance to the Louvre -- the sacred tomb that houses the sacred twist ending to the most popular novel of the past decade -- is a fucking mall.
At Le Carrousel du Louvre, which translates roughly into "The Large Rotating Machine of the Louvre," you can get just about anything you want -- from jewelry to furniture to a freaking Hertz rental car.
At the time of the shoot, the filmmakers didn't have to cover up the presence of an Apple store because it didn't exist yet. However, the filmmakers did have to cover up a Resonance music store, along with an Esprit fashion store, a chocolate shop and a goddamn Virgin Megastore. Suddenly the ending to that film becomes a whole lot more depressing when you're picturing Mary Magdalene entombed under a food court.
"She rests at last beneath the McCafe ..."
#4.
It's Always Winter in Moscow, and It's Always Sunny in Australia
Go ahead and try to think up a movie that takes place in Moscow that doesn't involve either a shitload of snow or cold, overcast skies that appear ready to dump a shitload of snow.
Makes you wonder how Mickey Rourke's character in Iron Man 2 got such a hard-core tan.
Now try to picture a movie set in Australia that doesn't show the vast, dry desert and blinding sun that you apparently find year-round everywhere in the country.
But it makes sense, right? Sure, Moscow must see the sun every now and then, but we've all seen GoldenEye. The whole goddamn country looks like this:
And the inhabited parts of Australia are pretty much the opposite:
The thing is, go ahead and switch those pictures around. What you're looking at in the second picture above is a beautiful summer day in Alexandrovsky Garden, which is right near the Kremlin in good ol' Moscow -- a city which, by the way, just broke its summer record with temperatures close to 100 degrees. In fact, it's pretty much on par with New York City as far as climate goes, though the figures are still out on the ratio of douchebags and misspelled graffiti per square block.
But the snow? That surely can't be Australia, can it?
The only thing missing is Crocodile Dundee making a snowman.
That's Canberra, Australia, which is just outside Sydney. And what you're seeing isn't all that unusual. In fact, Australia has something for everyone, from skiing ...
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... to tropical rain forests.
The only thing missing is Mel Gibson swinging on a vine. And threatening to kill his wife.
So why does Hollywood show only one major city surrounded by a freaking wasteland? To be fair, there is a whole lot of desert in Australia. Though hardly anyone actually lives there -- why would they? Imagine if every film that took place in America completely ignored the coasts. That's pretty much what Hollywood decided to do with Australia. All of the cities are on the coasts.
Take Kangaroo Jack, a film that completely revolutionized the "please kill me" genre. The heroes need to get to the town of Alice Springs, which is in Northern Territory, Australia -- pretty much in the dead center of the desert. They begin their journey by flying into Sydney and renting a jeep to start their adventure, because even though Sydney is more than a day's drive from Alice Springs, it is clearly the only international airport in Australia. After a drive through nothingness, they arrive at the city, only to find more nothingness:
It's so dry here that even the architecture can't grow.
Why would anyone actually live somewhere like that? The answer is, they wouldn't. Which is why Alice Springs actually looks like this:
Which admittedly looks like the fake neighborhood that exploded around Indiana Jones.
I went to D.C. the other week, and that was actually something I noticed, because I've been to New York City (which has practically nothing BUT skyscrapers). D.C. actually kinda looks like a really big town. Not that it isn't cool obviously. But still.
Reply1. Coney Island is just a short ride from midtown Manhattan (A.I.) Reality: more like an hour away.
Reply2. The Golden Gate Bridge is just a short stroll from the cable cars and Fisherman's Wharf. Try miles, and a total nightmare to drive. There is NO easy drive across San Francisco.
3. It rains all the time in Seattle. Reality: Seattle is in the rain shadow of the Olympic Mountains and gets less rain than many other cities in the U.S. It gets a lot of light rain, and it didn't help that every window scene in Frasier had a stagehand hosing down the window. But it can rain pitchforks there, too.
4. Maine is all seacoast. Apart from the part that sticks 200 miles into Canada.
5. South Dakota is the Black Hills. And the 300 miles or so east of it. With a Wall Drug sign every 200 yards.
6. Nebraska is flat as a board. Well, Interstate 80 is. Get into the Sand Hills and around Scotts Bluff and it's remarkably scenic.
7. Sending the Cherokee to Oklahoma was barbaric. But a barren desert wasteland it is not. The eastern end is very green.
Even these pictures don't do justice to how close Cairo is to Giza. It's literally on the other side of the fence. Here's a pic I took standing between the Sphinx's paws:
Replyimg dot photobucket dot com /albums/v55/Chivalrous8/IMG_1567.jpg
(apparently they don't let you type a real url here)
Not only can you see how close the city is, but to you see that square red and black building a little left of center? That's a KFC/PIZZA HUT directly across the street from the entrance gate. (and for the record, the only reason I was allowed within the Sphinx enclosure is because I was on a tour with a very well connected person.
In all fairness, I live in Brisbane and it never snows. I mean, literally - the lowest ever recorded temperature is 3 degrees C - and the lowest average high is 21.9 degrees C. Brisbane isn't even that warm compared to other Australian cities. Alice isn't even that hot (comparatively), Darwin is hotter on all but maximum recorded temperature. It is very very dry though, it is only green because of the people.
Reply...really? canberra's just outside sydney? try over 3 hours outside of it...
ReplyFuckbunkies.
ReplyThat photo of the pyramids sitting right next to Cairo would fit in on one of those "Images You Won't Believe Aren't Photoshopped" articles here on Cracked.
ReplyAny Australian could tell you those two photos are the wrong way around. The lighting for the garden in the Alexandrovsky Garden and the trees are all wrong for Aus.
ReplyAlso, Canberra is THE CAPITAL of Australia. It has slightly more significance than being "near Sydney". Surely you Yanks should know that by now.
yeah near being 2-3 hours highway driving away.
But to be fair it is Normally sunny and snows in very few places during the peak of winter.
Do American realise the Australia is almost the same size as the USA? we have the whole variety from tropical to temperate Beaches to Mountain Forests, Deserts and Mangrove swamps.
To be fair, 2-3 hours of a drive is near around this part of America (Texas). So I say my town is near Houston (about 1.5 hours at 120kph) and not too far from Austin (about 2 hours at the same speed).
Hate to nitpick (especially when you nailed the pyramids), but nitpicking is what the comments section is for. Mexico city is many, many hours from the border. North Mexico and cetnral Mexico are very different places- North Mexico is desert-like, has some old churches, and has as much in common with Mexico city as Washington does with New York. Maybe less, actually.
ReplyHere's a bizarre one: any American show that depicts Canada (by name) invariably shows it as a giant forest sparsely inhabited by ridgerunners in Mackinaw jackets. Yet 90% of Canadians live in the cities, so much so that Canadian academics sometimes refer to us as an "archipelago". This is bizarre, since our cities, especially Toronto and Vancouver, serve as Big Gritty City sets for most American movies, though of course they're always identified as New York or Chicago or, apparently, Washington DC.
ReplyBy the way, about half of the actual howling wilderness in Canada is flat treeless plains.
Most of the population also lives within 100 miles of the US border, so Canada (the landmass) is mosly uninhabited wilderness.
Luls, some places in Mexico do look like that, but we're talking about places very far away from cities and such. Just like in the USA, you can find little towns that look really old, but not THAT old LOL. Also Mexico is not that dangerous, the beaches get crowded during spring break and other holidays with americans. Plus the army and navy is always there on tourist hotspots:)
ReplyLuls? LOL? Oh my. That s**t is like laughing at your own joke, but lazier. Decent writing implies the author's mood. Let's all pretend that 1990's net-speak is a thing of the past. Boom.
I haven't been to Mexico, and I don't know whether much of it looks like that little adobe village. But you couldn't prove it doesn't by showing pictures of Mexico City--the largest city in North America. That's like complaining about depictions of Iowa cornfields and showing pictures of Manhattan to prove that's not what the United States looks like.
ReplyThat's the point of the article. When the United States is depicted in movies, it's shown in all sorts of ways, from the Iowa corn fields to Manhattan. But nearly every time Mexico or one of these other places is depicted, it's shown in basically one way. The writer is showing other sides to them that most people wouldn't think of if they only watch movies.
Except that they came right out and said, "no freaking town in Mexico actually looks like that anymore." And then proceeded to demonstrate that by immediately talking about, and showing pictures of, Mexico City. But pictures of Mexico City have nothing to do with whether northern rural Mexico (where a criminal would end up if they slipped across the border) consists of adobe villages. Whether it does or it doesn't, they've stretched the point farther than their own evidence will go and given a picture as one-sided as that of Hollywood, is what I'm saying.
The Mexico thing is very similar to how people tend to see Brazil (and several other 3rd World countries, no doubt). And any references go from absolutely ridiculous to f*****g insulting. It's really annoying because most of those things would be right if someone had just bothered checking Wikipedia.
ReplyThe Australia/Russia thing seems kind of obvious if you ever looked on a map and knows anything about seasons though.
You know, I was about to mention the view that every other American movie holds, that everyone in England lives in a castle, speaks like Jeeves and has met the royal family...
Reply...until I realised that the Queen visited my town today. Ah well. Tally-ho!
We know you really talk like the Manchester fans in Euro Trip (a more incomprehensible yet somehow impressive string of cussing I have never heard in America)
I'm from Wales and visited D.C with some friends on a school trip like 5 years ago. We were in a museum and got talking with some locals and told them where we were from, and they were all "Oh, so you're form London? LONDON BABY!". We were like "er...Wales isn't in London - or England for that matter". It's like saying to a Scottsman "Oh, let's grab our leprechauns, get drunk and go farm some potatoes!". Totally inaccurate.
ReplyEnough hate on mexico! I live there and it's a really nice place to live.
ReplyDid you read the f*****g article?
If anyone is curious, the reason why there are no skyscrapers in D.C. is because of a law stating that no building in Washington can be taller than the U.S. Capital building.
Reply"Lawless action-movie free-for-all" is a very accurate description of Mexico.
ReplyI'm pretty certain Mexico also doesn't have as open a policy to reporting sexual violence. That tends to affect the numbers.
ReplyYep, right next to the numbers they cited wiki says "Rape is rarely reported or punished, owing to old social norms, minor penalties for the crime, and criminal laws. In some rural areas, penalties for rape may consist of a few hours in jail, or minor fines.[5]"
yeah the hollywood movie are full of bull$hit something like moscow always winter australia always hot mexico like wild wild west territory wow full of crap!!! but good article anyways
ReplyHe barkido your English is getting better. Planning an invasion and want to be able to ask for directions to the nearest MaggieMoo's?