The 10 Most Terrifying Video Game Enemies of All Time
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Since the Golden Age of Atari, there have been video game enemies who are so unpleasant that they made us question the existence of a higher power. We at Cracked pay tribute to the rogues' galleries of yesteryear with this list of the 10 most trouser-soiling bad guys in gaming history. Some of these foes may not seem scary by today's standards, but in their heyday, all of them taught us how to swear, hit the reset button, and, most importantly, cry. #10.
The Wallmasters from The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time
Historically, video game players and enemies have agreed to disagree. We'll kill them and they'll kill us. It's a brutal social contract, but it's worked for the last 30 years. The Wallmasters flipped this script on us. Most bad guys are courteous enough to kill us as quickly as possible. Not these giant, zombie phalanges--they shanghaied Link back to the dungeon entrance, thus turning our adventure into a boring, repetitive slog and giving us a chance to meditate on all the free time we were spending pretending to be a fey elf dressed in a green camisole and tights. #9.
The Poltergeist from Splatterhouse
During the early '90s home console boom, nothing was creepier than Splatterhouse for the Turbografx-16. Sure, the game's AI was laughably primitive (the enemies' favorite strategy was to rush at you in a single-file line like undead conga dancers), but its revolutionary gory graphics made up for it. Look at those screenshots. If this was 1990, you'd totally be losing your shit right now. The game's most memorable boss was also its least bloody. In Level 2, the player confronted an angry poltergeist.
The spirit's weapons were antique chairs, silverware and a tasteful art deco tapestry (the monsters of Splatterhouse apparently shopped at Pottery Barn). Once you beat this evil bric-a-brac, the poltergeist retreated and, as a Hail-Mary "get bent," dropped the goddamn chandelier on you. Getting killed by that chandelier is an embarrassing experience you'll never forget, just like the day you lost your virginity. #8.
The Dog from Paperboy
Paperboy was a 1988 Nintendo classic about a plucky paperboy and an entire neighborhood that inexplicably wanted to murder him. The game never explained why and we were too weirded out to ask. Unsurprisingly, your main nemesis was a yapping canine. Avoiding this dog was easy, but avoiding the crap he chased you into was much harder. A savvy player could shut him up with a well-tossed newspaper, but aiming correctly meant nearly crashing into other fixtures of suburbia such as Hell's Angels, tornadoes and the Grim Reaper. Yes, this damn dog was scarier than Death itself.
#7.
The "Polygon Monster" from Out of This World
In this 1991 cult favorite, you play Lester, a dumpy physicist who is teleported to an alien dimension when his particle accelerator goes kaput. The 2-D side-scroller played by Contra rules: one hit and you're boned. Among the hostiles Lester met was this unnamed polygon monster. As soon as you arrived in the alien world, this fanged trapezoid immediately chased Lester off a cliff. If you failed to grab a nearby vine, the damn game was over in a crummy 90 seconds. This opening sequence helps explains why Out of This World only sold four copies.
#6.
The Cherub from Doom 3
Half Gerber baby, half Rosemary's baby, the Cherubs were the only scary thing about Doom 3, other than the painful fact that we shelled out $50 for this snoozer back in 2004. This was one of the very few actually frightening monsters in the game. It's not that the other monsters didn't look scary--they did--it's just that they were total idiots. When the Hell Knight got trapped behind a stack of crates, our hearts went out to him. It was like watching a three-legged puppy trying to catch a Frisbee. However, we had no sympathy for the cherubs. These enfants terrible came after our space marine like his body armor was covered in lactating breasts. Observe: When battling these diaper demons, we often resorted to the coward's tactic of haplessly waving around the chainsaw and closing our eyes until everything was dead. |
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I'll have to say the scariest enemies for me were the fish from Half-Life, Iron Maidens from RE4, and the headless suicide bombers from Serious Sam....I haven't played that game in 6 years and I still hear those fuckers scream. Oh, and all of Prey. That game was just f*****g wrong, especially watching a possessed child beat up and throw another little kid into a spike.
And Muffles, those were WAMPAS in Shadows of the Empire. Like the yeti-thing from Empire Strikes Back.
If you watch a video on Berzerk you'll notice that when you kill a robot, for like a half second when it's exploding, it shows a smiley face. lulz
In regards to the comment about Splatterhouse, if this were 1990, I most certainly WOULD be 'losing my s**t', as I would be exactly 6 days old.
Facehugger from aliens vs. predator > all. If it got, you, you DIED. And it didnt give any hints of its existence before jumping on your FACE. Game over man, gameover!
They forgot the wookies from Shadows of the Empire. The first time I opened that door and saw the wookie behind it rush at me, I was gripped with a terror so primal it makes me wonder if, perhaps, eons ago, when mankind was young, there were wookies, and they ate people. I've spoken to other people who played it, and they all felt the same fear when that wookie attacked.
Dude, where the hell is the Licker from Resident Evil 2? And Nemesis from Resident Evil 3? What about those damn naked kids that crawled through school in Silent Hill? f**k, those were creepy...
Has anyone played Haunting Ground? One of the craziest games I've ever played. The music and everything else that occurs when an enemy is chasing you makes you feel like you're having a panic attack. It's an intense experience, to say the least. It's on PS2.
Oh yeah, nintendo people those bullet things on Super Mario Brothers. Traumatizing. And those turtle...
(To this day, I have urges to leap on backs of turtle and kick them at solid objects to see if green mushrooms suddenly sprout. My therapist says its PTSD.)
Silent Hill was the first and only game that I ever played that really freaked me out. The spooky music and scenes set the perfect tone. Yeah, there are newer, better games but for its time, Silent Hill deserved to on the top ten.
how about almost everything from pathways into darkness, but especially the phantasms cause they were fast, hard to see, screamed, and you couldn't kill them with any of your weapons
Gauntlet Legends for N64. the damn suicidal guys who screamed and ran at you and then exploded. make me jump everytime.
or the berserker from Gears of War. definantly scared the s**t out of me. i hate being chased.
no, the scariest thing was the f*****g abomitable snowman from that skiing game. The one where you sky thru trees and such. idk what the f**k it was called but it was the most terrifying thing ever.
How the Hell are those tubby, big headed, underwear-wearing freaks from Tenchu not on the list? They f*****g breathe fire and dance!
whoa, what about iron maidens in resident evil 4??? those thing scare the f*****g s**t outta me, and ive played the game like 50 times thru by now... the way they sniffle and flop onto your neck and try to eat ya....shiver
I agree with the "everything from DeadSpace" comment. For serious. And why oh why are Silent Hill, Resident Evil, Fatal Frame, Alone in the Dark, and every other survival horror game essentially omitted from the list? Also Alma from the FEAR games. Children are terrifying, especially when they're dead, totally f*ck with your calm, and happen somehow to be your mother.
This article was posted before Left 4 Dead came out though I believe (but yeah I would have that in the top 5).
I dunno, im pretty sure The Witch from 'Left 4 Dead' was pretty flippin scary. the music that played, that eerie childlike crying you heard when you got closer to where she was...then that dead silence you hear when you realised you just startled her and she rips the s**t out of you!
i found the dahaka from prince of persia 2 scarey. i hated being in present time cause always the chance of it showing up and you having to run. to slow and you die. was a real pain.
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Where are any of the "Silent Hill"s?