Catching up on the news is a lot like taking hallucinogens and watching Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas: You have no idea which incredibly screwed up parts are actually happening, and which parts were made up in your drug-addled brain.

That's why we tasked our readers with taking recent stories that were big in the news and stripping them of any political bullshit or human bias. The winning submission is below, but first the runners-up ...

Entry by okojemiako

CBcnews IWorld Home Worlid Canada Poliltics Business Health Arts & Entertainment Technology Worid Photo Galleries Russians must admire chocolate Putin

Entry by Paka

If Recent News Was Giving You Truth, Not B.S.

Entry by okojemiako

NEWS Home Video World US & Canada UK Business Tech Science Magazine E Entertainment & Arts Worst Beatle possessions fetch $9.2m at auction from fan wh

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We are offering so many opportunities for you to win some dough that it'd be insane if you didn't get in on this. Aside from our photoplasties ($100 per contest) and GIFs ($150 per contest) we are paying out 10 winners for our macro contests. And YES, you can win all 10 spots ($350 payout) if you've got the skills to blow our minds that many times.

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