The Censored Version of 'Die Hard 2' Makes Sense, Actually
“Yippie ki yay, Mr. Falcon” is a valid statement.
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- By JM McNab
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0 'Friends' Gunther: Why Is He Funny?
Love and jealousy are not oil and water when it comes to sitcoms.
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- By Andrew Wheat
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Why Archer's Father's Identity Doesn't Matter
More like Sterling Ar… wait, I swear I had something for this…
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- By Cezary Jan Strusiewicz
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6 Side Effects Of Adding A Kid To Your House
Before you have a kid, your house is your home. Then babies come along.
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- By Chris Corlew
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Video Game Makers Forgot One Thing For Easy Mode
An open letter to platformer video game makers.
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- By Erik Barnes
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Cracked Plasticians
Having lots of money affords you a ton of things the common unwashed will never get: Solid gold toilets, caviar cereal, and a posse of Yes Men. And because of that last one, famous people end up saying and doing a lot of shit that they probably shouldn't.
With that in mind, we turned to those common unwashed that are our readership and asked them: If you could say one thing to a celebrity, what would it be? We gave money for the best response, but first the runners-up ...
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Related: From Joe Exotic to a Sexy Mail-In Ballot: A Comprehensive Ranking of 2020's Most Absurd Halloween Costumes
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