Felix Clay
I am Felix. I am not a cat.
I am on the Twitter. My the Twitter is twitter.com/Felix_Clay
The 6 Worst Pieces of Sex Advice on the Internet
These tips are by people who are unequipped to even hope to tell you how to be a better lover at all.
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- By Felix Clay
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4 Perverted Behaviors You Won't Believe Animals Exhibit Too
Don't go thinking that humans are alone in partaking in perverse behavior.
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- By Felix Clay
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6 Bizarre Ways to Stop Yourself From Masturbating
For the benefit of those wankerati and the just plain curious, I figured I'd check out some of the anti-jiggletime suggestions and try them out myself.
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- By Felix Clay
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The 5 Saddest Prostitutes in the World
There's a terrible underside to prostitution, and I'm not even talking about the underside of a prostitute
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- By Felix Clay
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4 Pros and Cons of Having a Personal Helper Monkey
In order to evaluate the awesomeness of a monkey helper, I did the only rational thing -- I acquired a helper monkey. Which is to say I sent an email and was told no, I cannot have a helper monkey because look how not disabled I am.
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4 Situations When You're Totally Supposed to Lie
We've carved out a few niche situations in life when not only do we find it acceptable to lie, we've pretty much all agreed it's expected and even better to lie, because the truth is just going to let everyone down.
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5 New Products That Prove Humanity Is Doomed
While a Snuggie is just a stupid invention, there's a whole different layer, a subculture, if you will, of products that bring shame not just to the people who made them or may use them, but to reality as a whole.
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The 4 Greatest Things in Life (Everyone Manages to Ruin)
Just FYI: I know one of you, and it's just one, eats bacon-wrapped bacon every day, has sex with supermodels, and gets paid to play video games, and this article means nothing to you aside from my hilarious jokes, and that's OK. No need to comment.
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- By Felix Clay
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5 Ridiculous Things Adults Do Thanks to Peer Pressure
According to a dozen videos I watched in high school, peer pressure will/did ruin my life and made me butt chug heroin-laced vodka and snort all the marijuanas ever. I typed this article from my hospital bed. All teenagers are the devil.
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5 Products That Let People Know You're Desperately Lonely
They say technology is creating an isolated, lonely society, probably. And look at the things waiting for those lonely suckers!
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- By Felix Clay
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4 Things (Seemingly Innocent) That You Should Hide From Everyone
You disgust in more ways than you ever thought possible.
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- By Felix Clay
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The 6 Most Terrifying Examples of 'Rule 34'
I Googled the ungoogleable. And now, with the help of photoshop censorship, I will share with you the awful truth of Rule 34. Get some popcorn!
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- By Felix Clay
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6 Amazing Movie Crossovers Hollywood Should Be Making Now
Godzilla vs. Mothra, Freddy vs. Jason, D Cup Debbie vs. The Dildonic Duo ... they're all classics. But there are plenty of other versus films we've never had a chance to see, and that's sad.
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- By Felix Clay
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The 4 Most Passive-Aggressive Ways to Get Revenge
I decided to try out a few classic revenge pranks on others and see not only which were most effective, but which filled me with the greatest sense of justice and well-being afterward.
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- By Felix Clay
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The 6 Grossest Anti-Smoking Ads of All Time
Eventually, anti-smoking ads will literally just be diseased organs stapled into magazines, but until then, we have ones like these.
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- By Felix Clay
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The 5 Creepiest Things Ever Done With a Fake Medical Degree
These fakers like to pretend to be doctors and will make you as uncomfortable as a real doctor but with the added threat of not knowing their asses from grape jelly.
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- By Felix Clay
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6 Office Pranks That Went Horribly Awry
You need to be careful with your office prankage, lest any of this shit happen and piss on your proverbial corn flakes.
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- By Felix Clay
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4 Dangerously Influential Dimwits
There are those people who have been elevated to a position of authority, rightly or wrongly, who use their power and influence to spread their wrongheaded beliefs, not just to the benefit of ignorance, but to the dangerous detriment of those who believe them.
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- By Felix Clay
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The 5 Most Disturbing Tween TV Show Universes
The problem with most tween TV, beyond the obvious, is the depressing and unfortunate world each one presents and never acknowledges.
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- By Felix Clay
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The 10 Most Depressingly Unfunny Gag Gifts
Gag gifts are suck gifts. They suck the funny from a room as sure as a porn star will suck a suckable something.
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- By Felix Clay
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