15 Studies That Prove Scientists Are Huge Pervs
![15 Studies That Prove Scientists Are Huge Pervs](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/8/7/7/881877_320x180.jpg)
Sex is both the most natural and hilariously weirdest thing we do (we are totally getting it, nightly, we just don't talk about it a lot - believe us), so it makes sense that it’s a topic ripe for scientific inquiry. There are so many questions demanding answers: What makes us attracted to some people and not others? How often does the average person have sex with how many different partners? Why do dicks look like that? Seriously, why?
But the scientifically fascinating nature of sex is also a great cover story for so-called scientists who clearly just want to get their freak on and then force other scientists to read about it (which may or may not also be part of their freak). From studies that seem a little too close to overt voyeurism for comfort to straight-up hammering their own ballsacks, it’s clear that these researchers had a little more than scholarship on their minds.
Electrical Banana
![Johann Ritter electrocuted his dick. In a series of early experiments with electricity, Ritter applied electrical currents to various body parts, including his dick, which he liked so much he scienced all over himself. It's not clear what he was trying to prove, but he judged it a resounding success. CRACKED.COM](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/8/9/3/881893.jpg)
Surprise!
![Giles Brindley flashed a whole lecture hall. To demonstrate his work with erectile dysfunction drugs, Brindley dropped trou right at the podium, which isn't technically a study but is a sex crime. CRACKED.COM](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/8/9/2/881892.jpg)
Play Time
![Simulating sex with toys. Scientists claim they were trying (and succeeded) to prove an evolutionary theory by using dildos on fake vaginas full of cornstarch semen, but it just sounds like what we used to do with our Babies. CRACKED.COM](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/8/9/1/881891.jpg)
Hungry Eyes
![Men like bigger boobs when they're hungry. the ESTERS can better - AGENCY off MIT To answer a question no one was asking, scientists tested men's preference for boob size before and after they ate and proved they really are just big babies. CRACKED.COM](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/8/9/0/881890.jpg)
Horny Issues
![Jerking it for justice. TED Scientists forced men to answer questions of sexual ethics while masturbating, ostensibly to test whether arousal affected decision-making but also probably because it was really funny. CRACKED.COM](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/8/8/9/881889.jpg)
The Twins
![Scientists looked at lots and lots of boobs. They compared the breasts and daily habits of twin sisters to determine what lifestyle choices might cause ta-tas to become less bodacious. They found nothing surprising and totally didn't write twincest fic later. CRACKED.COM](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/8/8/8/881888.jpg)
What Makes Butts Beautiful?
![Scientists looked at lots and lots of hot butts. To help plastic surgeons determine what butts should look like, they looked at 1,320 pictures of butts and talked about which ones were the hottest, which is just Friday night for lots of guys. CRACKED.COM](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/8/8/5/881885.jpg)
Whip It
![Spanking people makes them happy somehow. Russian scientists gave addicts a literal ass-whipping and found the ensuing endorphin rush cured their depression and pain. Weirdly, it works best when performed by a member of the opposite sex. CRACKED.COM](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/8/8/6/881886.jpg)
Foul Balls
![Two scientists crushed each other's nuts. Herbert Woollard and Edward Carmichael wanted to test nerve connections and found that nut shots did indeed cause generalized torso pain, which anyone who played Little League could have told them. CRACKED.COM](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/8/8/4/881884.jpg)
Buzz Cock
![Michael Smith encouraged bees to sting his junk. Не tested 25 different body parts, including his twig and berries, to see where it was most painful to be stung. The winner was actually the nostril, but the dick was close behind. CRACKED.COM](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/8/8/3/881883.jpg)
Having a Gas
![Nicholas Senn blew smoke (or rather hydrogen) up his own ass. It turned out to be an effective method of locating complicated wounds, but he had plenty of proof with other subjects. Не just wanted to see what it felt like. CRACKED.COM](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/8/8/7/881887.jpg)
Test Tube Babymaking
![Robert Dickinson f*cked women with test tubes. Не used phallic-shaped glass tubes to observe the physiological process of orgasm inside the vagina in the early 20th century. To be fair, speculums didn't exist ye-- oh, wait, they totally did. CRACKED.COM](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/8/8/1/881881.jpg)
Living It Up When You’re Going In (and Out)
![Sex in an MRI. Scientists convinced their subjects to have sex with each other and by themselves while an MRI machine took pictures of their genitals for... um... well, it's not totally clear why. Their conclusion is basically, Yes, it turns out we can do that. CRACKED.COM](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/8/8/0/881880.jpg)
The Tearoom Trade Study
![Watching public sex for science. The only way for sociologist Laud Humphreys to prove that all kinds of men were hooking up with each other in public bathrooms in the '60s was to hang around and watch them. His subjects were weirdly cool with this. CRACKED.COM](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/8/8/2/881882.jpg)
Operation Midnight Climax
![This MK-Ultra side project was more of a party. It basically consisted of hiring sex workers to drug men and let nature take its course while the CIA watched, which somehow proved something about Soviet mind control techniques. CRACKED.COM](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/8/7/9/881879.jpg)