15 News Reports From Our Bizarro World

We've all had to wade through an inordinate amount of bad news the last few years. But when you're trudging through the muck, it's important to stop and admire some of the odder chunks of goop that brush up against your leg. My grandmother always told me that. She was a weird lady.

Anyway, check out these weird chunks of goop! An inmate was found to have broken no laws when he told a guard to, quote, “kiss my balls.” Kanye made an incredibly insensitive remark, if you can believe it. And how's legalized marijuana going, by the way? Well, one company is getting sued for selling schwag weed. Meanwhile, a pet resort – yeah, “resort” – is having trouble finding employees, despite paying for a big-ass sign advertising open positions for “NON-STUPID PEOPLE.” 

Okay, so the state of the American businessman has fallen from the coke-fueled heights of the 80's. What about red-blooded Americans making a name for themselves by just… giving stuff away? The most popular destination for trick-or-treaters in all of Pennsylvania is none other than… The Potato Man. All that goop, and more, below!