25 Recent News Briefs That Had Us Reeling

Even Meta’s own chatbot doesn’t like Mark Zuckerberg.
25 Recent News Briefs That Had Us Reeling

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Burger King In Japan Introduces ‘Ice Whopper.’

A Burger King popup stand in Japan is selling an Ice Whopper to beat the heat. BURGER KING DRIVE THE WHOPPER THRU CRACKED.COM The burger, which is a lim- ited edition item only be- ing sold for two days, will feature the usual Whopper toppings - plus a layer of shaved ice. The meal comes with a frozen bottle of Coke.

Design Taxi

Copy-paste error results in Nevada homebuyer getting 87 properties for the price of one home.

A copy-paste error resulted in a homebuyer getting an 87-for-one deal on houses. GRACKED.COM The buyer ended up with an entire swath of lots in a subdivision in Nevada, all put in her name, when she was attempting to purchase a single home valued at $594,481.

USA Today

WHO warns people not to attack monkeys amid monkeypox outbreak.

The World Health Organization is urging people not to attack monkeys. CRACKED.COM Primates have been report- ed poisoned and killed in Brazil amid the monkeypox outbreak hysteria. WHO re- iterated that monkeypox transmission is from human to human.

NBC News

Is IRS Hiring 87K New Agents To Audit Middle-Class Americans?

No, the IRS is not adding 87,000 agents to their ranks to audit middle class Americans. CRACKED COM Some have claimed that the IRS is building an army of button-down pencil-pushers to steal money from hard working, middle class Ameri- cans-but the number used is an estimate covering the next nine years.


Three bison escape enclosure at Irish theme park.

Visitors to an Irish theme park and ZOO had to be put in the gift shop when three bison broke loose. CRACKED COM Park guests knew some- thing was up when a visitor spotted a loose bison wan- dering next to an amuse- ment ride. The cattle were herded back to where they belong, and the bison were also returned.


Oberlin College’s 'Professor of Peace' endorsed fatwa to murder Salman Rushdie.

The Salman Rushie fatwa was endorsed by Oberlin College's 'Professor of Peace.' CRACKED.COM The Islamic studies aca- demic endorsed the cam- paign to assassinate Rush- die, which nearly became a reality when Hadi Matar stabbed Rushdie in the neck and liver during a speech recently.


A banner at an August 2022 CPAC conference read, “We Are All Domestic Terrorists.”

A digital banner displayed at CPAC read, We Are All Domestic Terrorists. CPAC XPAC КРАС your Save Hand Somo FRINK Yone for por Yone for YOMAC KRAC Your Ame Your Love KING Apr face Ame Yove for Young Very KOREA Apr OPAC Ranc Have fonc Spec KATAC Love Hove Yearc Agree Kona some Ford Spec You CPBC Apric Know CRACKED.COM For York FBC done Among other digital ban- ners spotted during the conference was one bear- ing the slogan, You're Next: The Rise of the Democrat Gulag. Totally normal stuff.


Norwegian officials warned Friday they may have to euthanize a 1,500-pound beloved walrus.

A beloved walrus in Norway may have to be euthanized if people don't stay away from her. CRACKED.COM The 1,500-pound Freya has already been blamed for sinking several boats, and amassed adoring fans that catch glimpses of her sun- bathing by getting close to take pictures, sometimes with children.


Reported toad in distress in airport parking lot was monitor lizard.

A distressed toad in an airport parking lot turned out to be a monitor lizard. GRACKED.COM Rescuers were dispatched on a report of a toad wan- dering loose in the Guern- sey Airport's parking lot, but they arrived to find a very different animal, most likely a loose pet wa- ter dragon.


Wave of badly written Kindle titles on Pelosi, Taiwan hits Amazon's Kindle platform.

After Nancy Pelosi visited Taiwan, a wave of badly written books appeared on Kindle. CRACKED.COM The books use keywords Nancy Pelosi and China and Taiwan while laying out China's claim on the democratic island, and the author names are fake.

Radio Free Asia

In Utah, no child support, no hunting or fishing.

Utah discovered the quickest way to ensure child support payments: don't let the deadbeats hunt or fish. CRACKED.COM Rep. Karianne Lisonbee said she came up with it after hearing her constituents complain their noncustodial partners were spending money on hunting and fish- ing when they were behind on child support.


Intoxicated bear rescued after eating hallucinogenic honey in Turkey.

A brown bear in Turkey ate too much hallucinogenic honey and was on the trip of his life. CRACKED.COM The bear was found disori- ented after eating mad hon- ey, from the nectar of an in- digenous rhododendron, which contains a neurotoxin that produces hallucinogenic effects when consumed by mammals.


China's foreign ministry spokesperson says Taiwan is China's because there are Chinese restaurants in Taipei.

China says that Taiwan must be theirs because there are Chinese restaurants in Taipei. CRACKED.COM Chinese foreign ministry spokesperson Hua Chunying took to Google maps to point out the numerous dumpling and noodle shops in the capital city, Tweeting that The long lost child will eventually return home.


Builder taken to hospital after being knocked out by bottle of pee dropped from crane.

A builder was struck in the head by a falling bottle of pee. H & W GRACKED.COM The man, who was part of a team of builders working on a new health center, was taken to the hospital after the pee bottle tum- bled through the air from a crane 165 feet up.

The Argus

TikTok users are wearing their vaginal juices as perfume to activate their natural attraction.

TikTok users are wearing their vagina juices as perfume. AQUA ALLEGORIA TAMATA Such GRACKED.COM The new form of sexual at- traction is called vab- bing, and scientists are saying please stop doing this, it doesn't make any sense, this is not how pher- omones work.


Guinness-fuelled man becomes first to run entire width of Ireland in less than 24hrs.

A man ran the entire width of Ireland in less than 24 hours. GUINNESS CRACKED.COM The British marathon champion took on the 134-mile (215 km) jaunt after a pint of Guinness in Galway, before finishing with another at the end of the route.


Amazon studio plans lighthearted show of Ring surveillance footage.

Amazon is going to air a show that uses Ring surveillance footage. la CRACKED.COM 'Ring Nation' is a clip show hosted by comedian Wan- da Sykes, featuring danc- ing delivery people, ador- able pets, and terrifying corporate synergy that monetizes our feelings of security.

ARS Technica

New fear unlocked: wayward beach umbrellas.

A beach umbrella killed a woman when it was taken by the wind and impaled her chest. CRACKED.COM 63-year-old Tammy Per- reault died about an hour af- ter the incident. The U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission estimates about 3,000 people are injured by beach umbrellas every year.

AP News

Four tourists were rescued in France after being stranded due to the tide rising.

Tourists in France mistook the tide for a consequence of global warming. CRACKED.COM When asked how the fami- ly got stranded on rocks 1,600 feet from the shore, the father told rescuers that they had walked there when the tide was low, thinking the water receded due to the drought.

Le Telegramme

OnlyFans bribed Meta employees to put rival creators on terror watchlist.

OnlyFans bribed Meta to tag their competitors as terrorists. OnlyFans GRAGKED.COM Adult performers who sold their content on rival plat- forms of OnlyFans had their Instagram and Facebook ac- counts tagged as containing terrorist content by Meta employees since 2018.


Mental health nurse played 'chappy' on paranoid patient's door.

A mental health nurse played ding dong ditch on a paranoid patient's door. CRACKED.COM Royal Edinburgh Hospital nurse Douglas Masson was accused of knocking on the door of the patient and then hiding. The nurse was found to have put the patient at risk of psychological and/or emotional harm.

STV News

Brad Pitt says he wore a skirt to the 'Bullet Train' premiere because 'we're all going to die.'

We're all going to die.- Brad Pitt on why he wore a skirt to the 'Bullet Train' premiere. CRACKED.COM Pitt explained, I don't know! We're all going to die, so let's mess it up. This is a refreshingly hon- est answer, and he was most likely sick of defend- ing his wardrobe after a lifetime on the red carpet.


IRS faces online uproar over special agent job posting requiring ability to use deadly force.

The IRS posted a job which requires agents to use deadly force when necessary. CRACKED.COM A key requirement for Criminal Investigation Spe- cial Agents applicants is that they have to be legally allowed to carry a firearm, and major duties include be willing to use deadly force, if necessary.

Fox Business

Ferrari Is Recalling Nearly Every Car It's Sold Since 2005.

Almost every car that Ferrari has sold since 2005 is being recalled. CRACKED.COM 19 of its models dating all the way back 17 years are reportedly at risk for po- tential brake failure. 23,555 Ferraris are impli- cated and will need to be serviced.


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