We asked Cracked readers on Facebook, “What’s the worst financial advice you’ve gotten from a professional?” The following are all reader responses, not actual financial advice. Look, if we knew anything about money, none of us would have chosen to be writers in a job making internet content. Don’t take any of the following as some kind of reverse advice … but also don’t take it as straightforward advice. Please just don’t look to Cracked.com for any advice at all.

If The Wolf of Wallstreet (our only understanding of money) taught us anything, it was that Jonah Hill has some real range as an actor. It also taught us not to trust people in finance because they don’t really have any accountability. Your collective responses of cringe-worthy advice you’ve gotten from so-called professionals helped to affirm this loosely held belief. 

Read on to feel second-hand financial pain. Sending you good luck making an amount of wealth that lets you live comfortably. 

Cut out everything that isn't necessary!

... TELL US NOW. WORST FINANCIAL ADVICE CUT EVERYTHING THAT IS NOT A BASIC NEED Amanda M. says, Mental health is very important. If you give yourself nothing to recharge your mental battery then your job, family, everyone will notice. Yes, try to get cheaper hobbies or cut them down, but do not get rid of everything and think that only free things will be able to give you joy. You can only take so many walks before you get tired of it. CRACKED.COM

Invest in the Star Wars prequel!

... TELL US NOW. WORST FINANCIAL ADVICE INVEST IN THE PHANTOM MENACE! Nick T. shares, My senior year in high school was 1999, and our economics teacher enrolled our class in a statewide competition where we would use fake money to buy stocks and track whose stocks earned the most. Kinda like fantasy football for yuppies. We worked in groups and my group decided that they would invest in Industrial Light and Magic stock because surely The Phantom Menace would be the most successful and beloved movie ever. A friend of mine thought that was silly and convinced his group

Pay more than you can afford on a house ... in 2006!

... TELL US NOW. WORST FINANCIAL ADVICE YOU CAN AFFORD A HOUSE YOU CAN'T AFFORD Michael G. tells us, I had a realtor, back in 2006, tell me that I had no idea how much I could afford for buying a home. They said I was using old math and I could really afford nearly 50% more than I thought I could if I just took advantage of new loan offers that I hadn't considered. (In particular, an interest-only adjustable rate mortgage, because after all, it was guaranteed that the home would go up in value, and I could just

Save $100, regardless of how much money you need to survive!

... TELL US NOW. WORST FINANCIAL ADVICE SAVE $100 FROM EVERY PAYCHECK Amanda M. says, Most people (even middle class) live paycheck-to-paycheck so trying to save a huge amount will not work. You should try to save what you can, but, sadly for most people, you cannot save anywhere near that much. CRACKED.COM

Wait to lock in on an interest rate!

... TELL US NOW. WORST FINANCIAL ADVICE DON'T LOCK IN AT A GREAT INTEREST RATE Ente ] LOW INTEREST RATES Noah U. says, While refinancing my home about a year ago, my loan officer tried to sell me an adjustable rate loan in the midst of the lowest interest rates in my lifetime. Adding sarcastically, Yeah, I don't want to lock in historic low interest, I'd like to roll the dice after five years. CRACKED.COM

Buying a house is ALWAYS a good investment

... TELL US NOW. WORST FINANCIAL ADVICE BUYING A HOUSE IS ALWAYS A GOOD INVESTMENT Ruben D. says it's terrible advice to indiscriminately tell people that buying a home specifically for you to live in, with no timeline or definite plan on how to sell it, is an investment. Obviously a house can be an investment under specific circumstances but, for the majority of people, if you're buying a home because you want to own a home, there's nothing wrong with that. Giving this false notion that in a few years you're just going to cash out and upgrade is

Spend lots on higher education!

... TELL US NOW. WORST FINANCIAL ADVICE INVEST IN HIGHER EDUCATION Reid C. says, First it was 'go to college.' Then it was 'go to grad school.' Both pieces of terrible advice, and I bought them hook, line, and sinker. CRACKED.COM

Invest in Bitcoin/NFTs!

... TELL US NOW. WORST FINANCIAL ADVICE INVEST IN BITCOIN/NFT B HHH Marcin M. claims, Even a cursory review of the market and the product shows it's an MLM-style pyramid scheme. CRACKED.COM

Invest 10% of every paycheck ... even when you're broke

... TELL US NOW. WORST FINANCIAL ADVICE INVEST 10% OF EVERY PAYCHECK Glen Davis said someone gave them this advice when I was trying to figure out which bills to pay that week and which ones could wait one more week CRACKED.COM

Just leave money in your account!

... TELL US NOW. WORST FINANCIAL ADVICE JUST LEAVE YOUR MONEY IN AN ACCOUNT BANK Erik S. says someone told them: 'Just leave your mom's money in the account, you don't want to pay all that tax.' That was in 2008, right before Bush's recession. Lost over half when the market tanked. CRACKED.COM

Sell Apple low!

... TELL US NOW. WORST FINANCIAL ADVICE SELL APPLE STOCK FOR $8 Apple BUY SELL Kevyn L. tells us, I bought Apple stock when it first went public, at $12 a share. A couple months later Steve Jobs had the paternity suit and the stock went down to $8. My broker convinced me to sell. THEN I wanted her to buy Disney because they were starting Touchstone pictures. She said nobody buys entertainment stocks and convinced me to buy into an oil drilling company that went belly up in six months. CRACKED.COM

Spend more to make less!

... TELL US NOW. WORST FINANCIAL ADVICE SPEND £6000 TO MAKE £5000! 3+3= Steve W. tells us, Got an invite from one of the UK's big 'personal investment' companies. Went to the meeting. They tried selling me a product that would be me adding £100/month for five years...and receiving a lump sum of £5000 at the end! Sadly for them, I am reasonably good at mental arithmetic. CRACKED.COM

... TELL US NOW. WORST FINANCIAL ADVICE ALMOST ALL ADVICE AIMED AT POOR PEOPLE Brad J. says, At best the advice is clueless, at worst it's condescending and victim-blaming. 'If you didn't go to McDonald's on your lunch break, you wouldn't be poor!' It's ONLY because I now have an office job with semi-decent pay that I have the luxury of a savings account, credit card, and actually making long-term financial plans. Those things just don't happen on $10/hr. CRACKED.COM

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