17 Top Girlbosses (and Why They Are Right to be Awful People)

Sometimes, bad boys are girls.
17 Top Girlbosses (and Why They Are Right to be Awful People)

There’s a new trend out there, and it’s the take-no-shit, strong-ass girlboss. “Gatekeep, Gaslight, Girlboss” is their house motto. Bitchy, emotional and in control, girlbosses are either your favorite thing ever, or the most annoying, Mary Sue-but-evil, confusing, and awful trope to exist. But here’s a secret – girlboss is just an agonizingly gendered term for a Byronic hero

Moody? Check. Haunted by darkness in their past? Check. Willing to do morally indecent things to accomplish their oft heroic goals? Check.

Midsommar, Cruella, Maleficent – it’s the time of the girlboss. No more boring movies about depressed, dark-eyed, loner white boys -- that gives too much of a school shooter vibe. Now it’s time for (still mostly white) depressed, dark-eyed girls who rule the roost. From schools to multinational corporations, girlbosses rule it all. 

Who runs the world? Mostly the sociopathic, born rich, and formerly powerful in one way before moving to power in one way, like a book seller who becomes an astronaut, or a car designer who becomes an astronaut, or a phone service man who becomes an astronaut. But in fiction at least, some of those sociopathic rich astronauts… are girls. 

Here are some of the worst things that girlbosses have done, and the reasons they were basically justified in doing it. (Bonus points if they’re very hot and/or goth; that counts as a reason you’re allowed to do mostly morally objectionable things.)

Mystique in 'X-Men'

Girlbosses X-Men series Mystique WORST THING SHE DID Almost destroy the entire planet. Almost kill all humans. WHY Mutant liberation and freedom from oppression and assault. CRACKED.COM

Cher Horowitz from 'Clueless'

Girlbosses Clueless Cher Horowitz WORST THING SHE DID E Manipulate and deceive almost FENDI everyone around her, including her school officials, parents, and friends. WHY So that they'll end up happier. (Justified by the wedding at the end of the movie.) CRACKED.COM


Girlbosses Maleficent, Sleeping Beauty Maleficent WORST THING SHE DID Sleeping Beauty, etc. WHY To end the reign of corrupt lords. CRACKED.COM

Miss Piggy in 'The Muppets'

Girlbosses The Muppets Miss Piggy WORST THING SHE DID Frequently beat multiple people. WHY To protect her friends and make the best show she can, like a softer David О. Russell. CRACKED.COM

Cruella de Vil

Girlbosses Cruella, 101 Dalmatians Cruella de Vil WORST THING SHE DID Try to make herself a dog coat. WHY To prove herself better than her mother's killer. Still not a great vibe there, C. CRACKED.COM

Yennefer of Vengerberg in 'The Witcher'

Girlbosses The Witcher Yennefer of Vengerberg WORST THING SHE DID Manipulate, deceive, sacrifice those around her, ally herself with imperialist conquerors, polygamy. WHY Power. OK, that's less than noble, but she's a half-elf woman in a prejudiced land. Having power is probably great. CRACKED.COM

Source: TheGamer

Shiv Roy in 'Succession'

Girlbosses Succession Shiv Roy WORST THING SHE DID Talk a sexual assault victim out of testifying against her family. WHY To turn fictional Fox News (which has influenced major policy decisions) into a company for good. CRACKED.COM

The Doctor from 'Doctor Who'

Girlbosses Doctor Who The Doctor WORST THING SHE DID Commit multi-planetary genocide. Manipulate normal people into becoming killers. WHY To save all of time. CRACKED.COM

Vriska Serket in 'Homestuck'

Girlbosses Homestuck Vriska Serket WORST THING SHE DID Use others as sacrificial lambs. (Also, be generally annoying.) WHY To save existence. CRACKED.COM

Madison Montgomery from 'American Horror Story: Coven'

Girlbosses American Horror Story: Coven Madison Montgomery WORST THING SHE DID Kill a bus full of people. Torture and attack her friends. Use magic to manipulate, harm and deceive. WHY To gain more power (which she seems to need, given how often she's killed, tortured, or abused). CRACKED.COM

Terra in 'Teen Titans'

Girlbosses Teen Titans Terra WORST THING SHE DID Destroy the Teen Titans. WHY She was manipulated by an older man who used her, abused her, and abandoned her. CRACKED.COM

Love Quinn from 'You'

Girlbosses You Love Quinn WORST THING SHE DID Do some murders, want to boof her brother. WHY She wants nothing more than to help those she loves. CRACKED.COM

Amy Dunne from 'Gone Girl'

Girlbosses Gone Girl The amazing Amy Dunne WORST THING SHE DID Gone-girl herself, racking up multiple murders. WHY In a relationship with a man who hates her, lies to her, and cheats on her. CRACKED.COM

Jackie Burkhart from 'That '70s Show'

Girlbosses That '70s Show Jackie Burkhart WORST THING SHE DID Be a cheating, haughty ingénue who controls her boyfriend completely. WHY Her boyfriend is an idiot who gets into trouble every second she isn't there helping him. CRACKED.COM
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