Job interviews come in all shapes and sizes. Some are fun and informal, others are overtly professional and ask trick questions. Regardless of how many times you go over your strengths and weaknesses, it’s nearly impossible to prepare for all possible scenarios. And the stakes are normally incredibly high. Many of us live paycheck to paycheck so if we find ourselves paycheck-less, not getting that job may mean being unable to pay our rent. And yet somehow employers still expect us to say where we see ourselves in five years. Did anyone predict the world would be in its current state five years ago? Absolutely not. Many of us only have the luxury to be worried about where our money is coming from this month. 

In the spirit of communal hatred of the job-searching experience, we wanted to discover the absolutely horror-inducing extreme nightmares. We asked Cracked readers on Facebook, “What’s the worst job interview you’ve ever experienced?” We received answers from both the interviewer and, more commonly, the interviewee. Answers ranged from inexcusable rudeness to medical emergencies. The most common was interviewees being tricked into hearing a pitch for a pyramid or MLM scheme.

The ultimate walk of shame

... TELL US NOW. David G. says, The manager interviewing me was escorted out mid-question by security, and I was left alone in a room for a long time. When they realized their mistake it was the end of the work day. Turns out the manager hiring was suspended for stealing office supplies they found in the boot of his car. Two of which was a computer and a photocopier. I didn't even get the job! CRACKED.COM

None of your business

... TELL US NOW. Michael M. says, Well, the interviewer started asking the closing questions but then finally asked, 'So I see here that you have prior service...have you ever killed anyone?' My head just dropped as that is like the one question you never ask a veteran. I said, 'That's not something any of us like to talk about and isn't relevant to the position.' She didn't look satisfied with my answer but I ended up getting the position anyway. CRACKED.COM

Good enough to take

... TELL US NOW. Keith D. says, I used to work at a mall store and a girl came in for an interview one day. We asked her, Why would you be a good fit here?' and she enthusiastically said 'Oh, I'd be a GREAT fit here! I love this place so much, it's my safe haven! I used to steal from here all the time, but I don't any more!' CRACKED.COM

The Lost Sister

... TELL US NOW. Rick H. says, Interview, to my recollection, didn't actually go that badly, but the guy interviewing me asked me how my sister was. I do not have a sister. It was later pointed out to me that in all likelihood, he called me in with the hopes that it would score points with whoever he thought I was the brother of, presumably to get laid. CRACKED.COM

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Leave the pyramids to Egypt

... TELL US NOW. Derrick H. shares an experience that many others had as well, I showed up, and it was a pyramid scheme. CRACKED.COM

An emergency gab session

... TELL US NOW. Jennings M. tells US, I was interviewing someone for a job at my old hotel, when she got a phone call. She answered it without hesitation and said 'Hey girl! No I'm not busy.' I always did interviews in the lobby, so I just up and walked back to my office. She called two weeks later asking if she got the job. CRACKED.COM

A rejection email would have worked just fine

... TELL US NOW. Lisa А. shares, Went to the local newspaper for an interview. I walked in, was told to take a seat, and waited for an hour before the interviewer approached me. Не began berating me for 'missing the class.' Turns out, the interview was a group training session for anyone that walked through the door. Не made a grand show of wadding up my resume and using it as a basketball into the trash can... CRACKED.COM

What does she have to hide?

... TELL US NOW. Caitlin R. says, The interviewer was 25 mins late and said that an interview for me hadn't been scheduled, despite my receiving a confirmation email. The first Q I asked (when it was my turn to do so) was my attempt to gauge the interviewer's experience as a deputy manager, and she immediately shot back with a defensive 'You're not supposed to be asking questions about me. CRACKED.COM

Talent show gig

... TELL US NOW. Gregg M. says, A group interview where despite applying for and being invited to interview for a warehouse post the 'interview' was for for a storefront post I hadn't applied for or was asked to interview for. I upped and left when the interviewer wanted people to display their talents like singing and juggling. CRACKED.COM

Nothing to lose and everything to show

... TELL US NOW. Greg В. says, Went in to an interview for the fun of it knowing I already had an offer locked in at an other job. Once the stress of trying to impress was gone I was able to be a little cocky, but not disrespectful. I was able to joke around a little, but I didn't act like a total jerk-off. For those few minutes I gave off a pretty good aura of charm and qualification. The whole thing was perfect except my fly was open the whole time. CRACKED.COM

Safety first, financial safety second

... TELL US NOW. Robin S. says, The building caught on fire while I was being interviewed. In the middle of my interview, the fire alarm started clanging like mad, and the interviewer started tossing shit into a briefcase and grabbing her coat. 'Can we reschedule?' she asked me. I ran away and never went back. The fire department showed up just as I was leaving the parking lot. CRACKED.COM

Falling head over heels for a job

... TELL US NOW. Keri А. says, I fell down a flight of stairs walking out, both heels coming off and beating me to the bottom. CRACKED.COM

Right place, wrong time

... TELL US NOW. Megan S. tells us, I went on an interview for a labor and delivery nursing position while I was in labor! CRACKED.COM

Free labor doesn't always pay off

... TELL US NOW. Jack H. says, Had an interview/trailing at a catering hall. Realized after an hour of cooking that the other 40 or so people on-site were also on an interview. The owner basically almost got free labor for a catering gig before realizing I had informed everyone else of his scheme. We all walked out at the same time while he had to worry about every single pot and pan that was abandoned mid-prep. CRACKED.COM

The mystery of the missing interviewers

... TELL US NOW. Chuck M. shares, In the middle of the interview, the interviewers left without explanation. They returned 15-20 minutes later. They had left to get cake from some office birthday party. CRACKED.COM

Not safe for work required for work

... TELL US NOW. John I. said, I interviewed for a company that did the billing for adult websites. About halfway through the interview, one if the managers handed me a sheet of paper and told me to read it back to them. It basically contained about a dozen words that aren't repeatable in polite company. They wanted to see if I could read them with a straight face. CRACKED.COM

I've got such big balls...unfortunately

... TELL US NOW. Graham K. tells us, I kept getting calls from my phone, supposedly from a very persistent robo caller. To make matters worse, my ringtone at the time was 'Big Balls' by AC/DC. CRACKED.COM

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