15 Straight Bonkers Events Happening All Around Us

The universe contains an unfathomable amount of information that continues expanding every day; yet, somehow, humans keep making sense of it all through our limited comprehension. As complexity increases exponentially from each step forward we take, new mysteries continue popping up with greater frequency than before. Some theories become so complex that no-one can say whether it's possible to understand what goes on, say, beyond the event horizon -- but we try anyway. It helps make life bearable, knowing the world around us exists even when its rules are completely unknowable – if only because these strange truths, however ungraspable, give shape and substance to all events that happen within their influence. With that knowledge, even the attempt to grasp them is ennobling.

If there were some sort of comprehensible code that dictated what would happen next, then perhaps none of the madness on this planet would seem quite so incomprehensible. But, on the other hand, we probably wouldn't have lists like these anymore.

15 Police sergeant crashes his cruiser after taking meth from a suspect.

WEIRD WORLD Police sergeant steals meth from a suspect, gets high, and crashes his patrol car. POLICE F ADUTTING F M JUNGAI DE REGARITION I472238 - Sgt. Donald Dinell was arrested after he was involved in a crash in his police cruiser, and a drug test found him positive for fentanyl. Не faces charges for DUI, drug possession and robbery. CRACKED.COM — Source: MSN

14 The tin foil hats are out in New Zealand.

WEIRD WORLD New Zealand protesters are wearing tinfoil hats to stop the government's radiation rays. Those protesting at Parliament are increasingly reporting symptoms of illness and linking it to a conspiracy theory that the Government is making them sick with a radiation weapon. CRACKED.COM — Source: NZ Herald

13 Judging by the pictures of the dorm, maybe displacement is a blessing in disguise.

WEIRD WORLD 22 people were displaced after a BYU student made rocket fuel in his dorm. The unnamed resident had been making homemade rocket fuel on their stove when the volatile mixture suddenly exploded into a fireball. The flames engulfed the walls and ceiling and set off the sprinkler system, flooding the living room that for some reason has a toilet.y — Source: CBS

12 An incorrect order at McDonald’s ends with a man telling his toddler to shoot at the cops.

WEIRD WORLD A Utah man ordered his toddler to open fire on the police officers that were arresting him. McDonald's A 4-year-old opened fire at police officers after his father told him to as he was being taken into custody for brandishing a weapon at McDonald's employees over an incorrect order. CRACKED.COM — Source: Yahoo News

11 Endangered sharks have found their way into pet food.

WEIRD WORLD Your pets may be eating endangered sharks. DNA evidence shows endangered shark meat, labeled as ocean fish, is present in several brands of cat and dog food, being fed to pets by their oblivious owners. CRACKED.COM — Source: The Guardian

10 -year-old boy's hair isn’t just out of control, it’s medically out of control.

WEIRD WORLD A boy was diagnosed with uncombable hair syndrome. 1-year-old Locklan Samples was diagnosed with the rare, but harmless, disorder after someone saw his picture on Instagram and contacted the mother. Only about 100 cases have been reported in medical studies. CRACKED.COM — Source: Mom raises awareness after son is diagnosed with uncombable hair syndrome

9 China politely asked for the Ukraine invasion to be postponed.

WEIRD WORLD China asked Russia to consider delaying their invasion of Ukraine until after the Beijing Olympics. Senior Chinese officials told senior Russian officials in early February not to invade Ukraine before the end of the Winter Olympics in Beijing, quoting Biden administration officials and a European official who cited a Western intelligence report. CRACKED.COM — Source: Reuters

8 One adult company provides employees with state-of-the-art masturbatoriums.

WEIRD WORLD Adult company makes masturbation pods available to employees. Cyprus-based adult website Stripchat installed four pods for its 200 employees and will allow them 30-minute paid breaks during work hours to make use of the space and the provided VR headsets. CRACKED.COM — Source: IFL Science

7 A 75-year-old was killed by his pet cassowary.

WEIRD WORLD A Florida man in 2019 became the first person to be killed by a cassowary since 1926. 75-year-old Marvin Hajos died doing what he loved, said his fiance. Evidence suggests the man fell and spooked his pet bird, which proceeded to attack him with its 4 inch, dagger-like claws. CRACKED.COM — Source: NY Times

6 Man goes to jail for using government money to buy Charizard card.

WEIRD WORLD A $57,000 Pokemon card was purchased using COVID-19 relief money. The 31-year-old man has been sentenced to 36 months in prison after taking out $85,000 for his small business and using it to buy a first-edition, shadowless, holographic Charizard card. CRACKED.COM — Source: Polygon

5 The MyPillow guy really, really wants the Canadian truckers to get his products.

WEIRD WORLD Mike Lindell wanted to drop his MyPillows via helicopter in support of the Canadian truck convoy. Lindell tried to ship his pillows but his products were denied entry into Canada, so he's taking to the skies. Не intends to drop his pillows into Canada from a helicopter with little parachutes attached, saying We need to get the MyPillows to the people! CRACKED.COM — Source: Daily Beast

4 Three states want cops to not have to pay taxes.

WEIRD WORLD Some states are trying to make cops exempt from paying taxes. Republicans in Georgia, Kentucky, and New Mexico have introduced bills that would spare law enforcement officers from having to pay state taxes, as a means to entice more people to become police officers. CRACKED.COM — Source: Vice

3 Someone died after drinking 5 grams of caffeine.

WEIRD WORLD A personal trainer drank the equivalent of 200 cups of coffee and died. Tom Mansfield, 29, got his maths wrong when measuring a dose of caffeine powder, pouring himself 5 grams - the equivalent to 200 cups of coffee. CRACKED.COM — Source: Yahoo News

2 People affected by backwards marijuana laws will be first to get retail license.

WEIRD WORLD People convicted of marijuana offenses will be the first in NY to get a retail license to sell. Officials intend to reserve the first 100 or more retail licenses to sell marijuana in New York for people who have been convicted of related offenses, or their relatives. CRACKED.COM — Source: NY Times

1 Russia is destroying evidence of their casualties as they go.

WEIRD WORLD Mobile crematoriums are following Russian troops into battle to hide losses. The vehicle-mounted incinerators will be used to hide evidence of casualties as Putin sends more troops into Ukraine, says UK Defense Secretary Ben Wallace. CRACKED.COM — Source: Telegraph

John Oliver Laments HBO Mergers and Having ‘Three Different Business Daddies in 10 Years’

40 Random Bits of Trivia That Should Win Us the Pulitzer

All Howard Stern Ever Really Wanted Was the Legitimacy of Interviewing a Sitting President

‘Young Sheldon’ Star Calls Cancellation ‘Such A Stupid Business Move’

26 of the Funniest Tweets from Friday, April 26, 2024