13 Respected Figures with Ridiculous Beliefs and Superstitions

Val Kilmer thought his throat cancer was just “an outward manifestation of a spiritual cold.”

Authors: By Andres Diplotti, Jay L'Ecuyer
Published: March 20, 2023
Comments: 5

Andy Kaufman Gets the Belt as Member of WWE Hall of Fame

Yelling to a packed arena: ‘I will not enter the ring until everyone in here is absolutely silent!’

Authors: By Matt Solomon
Published: March 20, 2023
Comments: 2

Ben Stiller’s ‘Encino Man’ Screen Test Is Exactly As Silly As It Sounds

Pauly Shore released a snipped of Stiller’s audition, and it’s prehistorically playful

Authors: By Keegan Kelly
Published: March 20, 2023
Comments: 2

Eminent Jon Lovitz Instagram Influencer Finds Holy Grail of Nostalgia Pics

Jon Lovitz and Tony Danza adorned in throwback Dodgers uniforms is perfect 1993

Authors: By Keegan Kelly
Published: March 20, 2023
Comments: 0

Chris Rock Says Arresting Trump Is ‘Stupid’

This might be the only way in which Trump is like Tupac

Authors: By Matt Solomon
Published: March 20, 2023
Comments: 9

13 Now-You-Know Facts About Witches (They Didn’t Teach At School)

By:: Andrea Meno

November 24, 2021

13 Now-You-Know Facts About Witches (They Didn’t Teach At School)

History has a lot fewer witch burnings than you probably think, and a lot more witches (supposedly) turning into animals and, uh, stealing butter. Here’s more:

13

Apparently, witches weren't always shown flying just on broomsticks. They'd also use, say, cupboards, wardrobes, stools, and even two-pronged forks for cooking. NOW YOU KNOW CRACKED.COM — Source

12

The Salem witch trials might have been caused by hallucinogenic fungus. Ergot can get into bread and can make you see weird things while suffering spasms - basically, you look bewitched. NOW YOU KNOW CRACKED.COM — Source

11

Butter used to be associated with witches in Ireland back in the day. BUTTER 1 FIRST QUALITY 1 NET WT. 4OZ. (113g) BUTTER Butter was used in Celtic pagan rituals, 1/2 CUP START MEASURE HERE 1/4 CUP-> 1/3 CUP-7 and also, a witch could steal a neighbor's لم ESPOON MEASURE: 7 8 6 4 5 3 butter luck using magic. ABELED FOR RETAIL SALE CRACKED.COM NOW YOU KNOW — Source

10

Eye of newt in a witch's potion recipe isn't a part of an actual animal. It's actually just another name of mustard seed, and many other witch's potion ingredients are also just various herbs and so on. NOW YOU KNOW CRACKED.COM — Source

9

One popular way to see if someone was a witch was actually to weigh them. Witches were so light that they could float on water, the belief went, so suspects would get weighed. NOW YOU KNOW CRACKED.COM — Source

8

For five centures, the Catholic Church refused to even acknowledge witches existed. That was from 900 to 1400 - and, not long after that, they got pretty enthusiastic about putting witches on trial. NOW YOU KNOW CRACKED.COM — Source

7

In the Middle Ages, witches stole penises and then would just keep them as pets. They'd also sometimes put them in nests and feed them oats, all according to an anti-witchcraft guide from that time. NOW YOU KNOW CRACKED.COM — Source

6

People used to think that witches could actually shapeshift into cats. Apparently that's why one pope said that the cat was the devil's favourite animal and idol of all witches. NOW YOU KNOW CRACKED.COM — Source

5

There's a popular superstition that witches can actually turn into butterflies. They'd do that to, well, steal butter (and milk) - that's how the butterfly got its name. NOW YOU KNOW CRACKED.COM — Source

4

It's possible that we got the stock image of the witch from medieval beer makers. Women beer makers wore pointy hats to stand out, made beer in cauldrons, and used broomstick-like signposts. NOW YOU KNOW CRACKED.COM — Source

3

Contrary to popular wisdom, witch burning wasn't really a thing in the Middle Ages. It only got going after the Middle Ages ended, and really kicked off around 1500. NOW YOU KNOW CRACKED.COM — Source

2

Centuries ago, they believed that witches literally kissed the Devil's ass. It was called the Kiss of Shame, and the belief was that it was how witches said hello to Satan. NOW YOU KNOW CRACKED.COM — Source

1

They didn't actually burn witches at the stake during the Salem trials. Some were sentenced to death by hanging, and some died in jail (and one person was pressed by stones to death) but nobody got burned. NOW YOU KNOW CRACKED.COM — Source

Recommended For Your Pleasure

Whitney Cummings Says Comedians Have Become the Enemy

Maybe positioning comedy as ‘emotional sex work’ can help?

Authors: By Matt Solomon
Published: March 20, 2023
Comments: 7

The Inside Story of ‘Poochinski,’ the Sitcom in Which a Dead Cop Is Resurrected into a Crime-Fighting Bulldog

It’s quite a tale (tail?)

Authors: By Brian VanHooker
Published: March 20, 2023
Comments: 1

All the Roasting of Adam Sandler As He Won the Mark Twain Prize

‘Stay in your lane, Waterboy’

Authors: By Matt Solomon
Published: March 20, 2023
Comments: 2

Animated Andy Samberg Performances, Ranked

Before ‘Digman!’ there was some dumb movie about storks

Authors: By JM McNab
Published: March 20, 2023
Comments: 1

Nine Reasons Why the Allegedly Bad Season Nine Is Actually Peak ‘Seinfeld’

Anything with this much Puddy can’t be that bad

Authors: By Eric Dobin
Published: March 20, 2023
Comments: 4

Simpsons Fans Are Livid That ‘The Simpsons’ Broke the Albert Brooks-Marge Simpson Continuity

Don’t even get them started on the magic xylophone

Authors: By Keegan Kelly
Published: March 20, 2023
Comments: 7